the minor details

you're pretty worthless

hi guys i just wanted to say thank you guys so much for taking the time to comment. it seriously makes my entire day reading them:))

MAJOR TW!!!!!! TALKS ABOUT SUICIDE!!!

                           SARA'S POV

i spent most of my classes today staring into space and thinking. i had definitely fallen head over heels for gwen, but oh my god she was my teacher. even if we decide we want to be together in a month, i'll still have the rest of this year and next year with her as a teacher. there was so much to consider, like how she could lose her job, the amount of trouble i would get in if someone found out, etc. although just thinking about this morning made me smile. i woke up in gwen's arms, and nothing could make me happier than that. the bell rang, signaling the period was over. i had english next, and gwen taught that class. god, it was going to be so weird knowing i spent the night at her house last night and made out with her this morning. i wasn't thinking straight, why did i kiss her? now it's going to be even harder to stay away from her. maybe i could distract myself with someone. like eloise. i hated using her as a distraction, but what choice did i have.

gwen was waiting outside her classroom, greeting students as they walked in. i approached her and said

"good morning miss james"

"morning miss nicks" she said with a smirk and an eyeroll. i settled into my seat at the back of the room. then i noticed eloise walk in, and her face lit up when she saw me. she rushed over to me and gave me a hug. she pulled away so our faces were inches away, and her eyes drifted over my lips. she then lightly kissed me for a few seconds. i couldn't push her off of me without looking like a total bitch, so i just let her kiss me. after a few seconds, she pulled away and sat at the desk next to me. i heard the door close, and gwen walked to the front of the classroom with a look on her face that told me she was absolutely pissed.

she began her lesson with a resting bitch face. i admired her while she talked. she had a pencil shirt on today, and a tank top with a blazer. you could see all her curves in that outfit. plus she had curled her blonde hair and was wearing red lipstick, which practically had me drooling like a damn dog. i spent the rest of the period staring at her as she talked about english-y things that i didn't care to listen to. then i heard the bell rang, and as i was putting my stuff into my bag, gwen said

"miss nicks, stay after class please" i sighed, just wanting to get the hell out of this room. eloise gave me a sympathetic look, before giving me a quick peck on my lips and hurrying our of the classroom, leaving me and gwen alone. i walked up to her desk, not sure what to expect.

"i need to talk to you" she said with a somber look. "this morning was a mistake." this made my heart drop to my shoes. how could she invite me to her house, cuddle with me, makeout with me twice, and still call that a mistake. i laughed to myself, and shook my head.

"i knew you would do this gwen. i knew you would get scared and run away, just like all the other times" i said with a cold tone.

"sara i-"

"no, let me finish. a mistake is putting your pants on backwards. a mistake is forgetting to water a plant. what happened last night, was not a mistake. you deliberately invited me to your house, told me things would work out with us, cuddled me, and let me kiss you. you knew what you were doing gwendolyn, so no, it was not a mistake!" i was full-on yelling at this point. did she really think i was going to let her pass this off as a mistake?

"i'm sorry. i really am. i didn't mean to toy with your feelings, and i wasn't lying when i said that stuff last night!" gwen said, matching my volume. "okay? i do have feelings for you, but nothing can happen between us! for god sakes, i'm your teacher! do you know how much shit i could get in, if someone found out? and you're only a junior, you'll still be a student next year and i'll still be a teacher! you're practically a child!"