Assassin's Creed Valhalla: The Forgotten Love

14 [A Life I Wish I Knew]

I didn't fall asleep until very late in that night, the anger was still hovering the surface with everyone's eyes still burned into my skull. I hated that look it was always on everyone's faces when I was growing up; I couldn't even go to the small town near my old village anymore, the people there would usher their children inside calling me a curse from the gods every fucking day and night I hated so much. And here I thought I finally was able to find a place with my old clan but no; those hopes were killed the moment Dag opened his big mouth that I wish I could shove his axe into.

Closing my eyes was a bit hard since my mind was still awake but I needed to sleep a few hours if not minutes. The sleep slowly took over my body as I drifted off into whatever dream there was out there in this world we call life.

The sounds of something snapping brought me out of my sleep letting my eyes open when I saw I was no longer in my tent but in a place that I once was before back in Norway when I was knocked out, the trees of death and black ink dripped from the broken tops of the trees; the shallow black water under my feet as I walked slowly through this place.

"Why am I here?" I asked not bothering to turn around to know who was behind me leaning against a tree.

"You tell me young warrior we are one in the same" Hel's voice echoed through the realm that I seem to be connected to.

"We are not the same!" I shouted at her when I turned to face her.

My words only made her laugh as she came into the light showing her long black hair, her eyes looked like the dead themselves not to mention her skin on the left that seem to still remind me of my own burns but on a different scale.

"You've lived through my old memories, felt the things that I have felt! And loved the same man that I have loved and still love but choice to forget my selfishness so he could have what I couldn't! What YOU CAN NOT HAVE!!" her words struck me in my heart, it was true I knew half of her story just like she knew half of mine.

But thinking about that world still made me think about the feeling I once felt before, familiarities was what I felt when she brought it up again and now thinking about what me and Sigurd feel made me start to doubt the words he spoke to me. I know he already had a wife though it may have been for the clans and not filled with much love but I know that Randvi would be a better pick to bare Sigurd's children than me.

"See, you can't help but feel alone in a world where no one thinks of you as a human; seeing their eyes tells you all that they will never accept who you are" Hel was now near my right ear hissing her words into my brain which only made me remember the looks of everyone's faces in the longhouse.

"That may be true, but I will be there for my brother and for Sigurd only them and no one else" I said with true words since I know I will always be there for them even if they were never there.

"So foolish...." She sighed crossing her overs over her chest.

"If I am foolish, than you show me if I never looked like this and stayed what would my life be like to this day!" I shouted at her hating that she thought of me as a weak fool holding onto whatever hope there was.

She sighed again looking to her feet before placing her hands on her hips facing me with a serious look on her face.

"You will only torture yourself by those memories that could have been, why would you want to see something you know you can never have!?" she asked me in a serious tone as she stared into my eyes.

"Because pain is the only way I know how to move forward and it might give me some peace of mind if it doesn't than I'll gladly let my mind torture me until death...." I spoke in a soft tone as I glanced at the ground at my feet seeing my reflection facing me.