Baby Bottle Brews

Chapter 5: Satisfying All

Neither of us said anything for a good three minutes; it was just pure silence. I really wasn't sure what she was feeling, like if this was going to turn into some big argument, but I wasn't sure how I was feeling either. Of course this was an amazing job opportunity for me, like how many people can say Beyoncé has requested for them personally, but Santana's five months pregnant, there's no way I could leave her especially with what happened just last month. I'd be constantly worrying myself to death not being able to see what's going with her! On top of that, it's Beyoncé that wants me. There's no messing up when it comes to her and I've somehow made a really good impression on her already. I can't ruin that by screwing up, I can't let her down. I don't know if I could handle that type of pressure. Then again, it's dancing; one of the very few things I'm absolutely sure I'm good at.

"The-uh-message said that I'd only be gone for six days," I added thinking that it would trigger Santana to speak, but she remained silently thinking. "They said I've got a few days to think about it, so.."

I stared back at her pursing lips as she stared down at her hands meddling in concentration. The silence was starting to get unbearable the longer we stood before each other. I wasn't sure if she was getting upset with me and we were about to go into some yelling match or what, but I couldn't take it. I couldn't take not knowing. I sucked in a deep breath then licked my lips.

"Can you just say something, please?" I sighed as I brought up my hand to knead at my brows tiredly, "I rather we talk this out aloud than you having a whole conversation about it in your head where I can't hear.." Her gaze flicked up from her hands and to my eyes as she slowly nodded.

"Right, sorry." She mumbled then set her hands on top of her belly and smiled to me, "Let's talk it out."

"Okay.." I drawled out, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear, and then leaned back against the kitchen counter. The both of us stared at each other again, but this time we were actually waiting for the other to speak. It dawned on me just then that we've never been in this type of situation before and neither of us knew how to go about talking it out. San tilted her head to the side, staring at me with her deep brown eyes, with this look like she was expecting me to say something. I guess it was my idea to do it this way so I should be the one talking, but I didn't really know how.

But the thing I love about Santana is she just knows when that happens. I don't have to say anything and she doesn't have to ask, she just knows for some reason.

Her lips curled into a amused grin as she crossed her arms, "You know this is your decision, B. I'm only here to tell you what I think, but really, it's all you." I looked back at her with my brows furrowed then shook my head.

"I want to decide together though.." I sighed, my arms folding to mirror her stance, "But I'm stuck." My eyes left hers when I saw that analyzing look in those soft browns.

"Well I think this is an awesome opportunity for you. It's not every day that the queen wants to work with you; personally I knew it was bound to happen, so I think you should go for it." She replied happily with a little shrug of her shoulder. I felt like I was searching for an answer and hoping that San knew it already, but that wasn't it.

"Yeah, I guess," I muttered with the nod of my head then peeked through my lashes at her, "But, I just-I can't leave you here by yourself."

"Brittany..I'm not going to let you use me as an excuse to hold yourself back." She said sternly, unfolding her arms to brush her finger beneath my chin to look to her directly. "What are you going to do? Put all these great opportunities on hold until I have the baby? But then when he's here, he's going to need the both of us and you'll want to be here to see him so what then? Are you going to hold yourself back again? I don't want that for you, babe, I don't want us to hold you back." I pressed my lips tightly together, trying my hardest not to cry in front of her, not because I didn't want her to see me cry, but because I couldn't understand why I felt like I was about to.