SPASE

BEFORE: CHAPTER EIGHT

Gasping for air, Maddie wakes up in a panic to see that the sun had already risen in the sky. The smell of their dad's whiskey and stale cigarettes lurks in the hallway and creeps in under their bedroom door.

The window is open, Melissa gone. Still bare-chested, they quickly rummage through the pile of notebooks to find their sketchbook hiding underneath. Maddie grabs it, as they pick through the clothes in the open dresser drawer: black hoodie, ripped jeans, and orange high tops. Running to their bedroom door, they surprise themselves that it is still locked from the inside and bump into the door as they try to open it.

Maddie unlocks the door, peeking into the hallway to see their dad's limp feet hanging outside of the entrance to his bedroom. He is out cold. Regardless, Maddie tip-toes to the bathroom to brush their teeth, wet their pixie cut, and wash their face. They glare up at themselves in the mirror to take an extra look at themselves. They feel different.

"She really likes me?" Maddie gawks. "Hopefully it wasn't just the heat of the moment."

Inside, Maddie panics.

BEEP BEEP BEEEEEEEP!

A car horn blares from outside. It's Nick.

"Holy shit! Where the fuck is my bag!" Maddie exclaims. Their dad's feet move slightly as they stomp through the hallway to grab their tattered book bag off of the top of the dresser. They also grab the sealed envelope that they put together to send off to the Rhode Island School of Design; the envelope that will seal their fate, and stuff it under their arm. The envelope contained answers to a questionnaire that the school had sent back in response to their application. While they still haven't heard anything about the application's status, the questionnaire determines if they would get a scholarship: something that they desperately need.

"Come on, Mad, what's the hold-up!" Nick yells, honking the horn in his 2003 black Suburban five times fast as if he is in Chicago traffic. "I can't be late to the first block again, otherwise I'll get my fourth tardy for the term and get ISS!"

Maddie bolts as fast they can out the front door, slamming it and hear shouts in the house.

"What the fuck is the matter with you? Can't you see..." Their dad yells.

Maddie doesn't pay any attention. They just keep running.

Maddie runs to the mailbox, inserts the big manilla envelope, and placing the mailbox flag in the upright position. Something stops them. As they exhale into the frigid air, their breath lingers like a cloud of smoke. They stare at the full mailbox for a second.

Nick interrupts Maddie's train of thought.

BEEP BEEP BEEEEEEEEP!

"Common, Mad! Let's go!" Nick screams.

Maddie gives the mailbox one last look and speed-walks over to Nick's car, leaving the envelope, trying not to slip on the iced-over driveway.

"What in the freaking hell took you so long? We have to get going! Mrs. S is going to tear me a new one if I don't get there in time!" Nick says. "Remember, I was sent to ISS for that shit last time? It was miserable!"

Maddie sighs, "You would have fifteen new assholes by now if that were the case."

"Ha-ha... well someone is being funny this morning, now can you put your seatbelt on for Christ's sake! You seem really happy this morning. Any particular reason?" Nick inquires, smirking in the process. Nick loves his gossip. He wants to know what the deal is.

"Nah, just gas..." Maddie states, giggling. There is a lot more going on than gas. Gas isn't even a part of it.

Maddie's thoughts travel back to the night before in their bedroom; how the silkiness of Melissa's skin felt up against theirs, how their lips danced in perfect synchronicity, how Melissa touched them in all the right places, (and in the right way too). Most importantly, the words that were spoken fill Maddie's brain, making them feel warm; not uncomfortably warm like a person would after they ran a mile, but warm inside as if a space that was previously empty, is full. Melissa's there.

Maddie continues to smirk to themselves. Nick glances at them a few times and finally speaks. "Riiiggghhhhttt, well just make sure to put a cork in it, so I don't have to smell any of that stank," Nick laughs and presses on the gas pedal so hard Maddie thinks it's going to go through the floorboard. As they approach the stop sign, a reminder on Maddie's phone dings. Maddie takes out their phone from their front pocket and looks down.

"Holy hell, that AP chem test is today!" Maddie screams. "Did you study?"

Nick takes his left hand off of the wheel to scratch the back of his head. When Nick is nervous or really concentrating on something, he always scratches his head. It's like a tick that he can't seem to get rid of.

"Do I ever study?" Nick replies, trying to play it all off like he's cool with not studying, even though that Maddie knows when his lip twitches, he's panicking on the inside.

Maddie quickly unfastens their seatbelt and reaches into the backseat for their chem book. A little extra studying can't hurt. A lot of extra studying would have been nice, but they were in their own world with Melissa last night, free of any kind of stressors that didn't have to do with Cedar Hill High School.

After getting a good handle on the book, Maddie sits back down in the front seat. The sound of screeching tires makes Maddie look up. The car slides, cracking along the ice below it like they are on a frozen lake and it's about to break.

Maddie doesn't have time. Nick doesn't have time. They don't have time to reach for anything, grab the "oh-shit" handle on the roof of the car. Nothing. They don't even have time to put their seatbelt back on.

"Oh, shit!" Nick screams. As Maddie hears the sound of glass shattering, their whole world becomes black.