NOT NOW // D.S

3.7

She had large wrap bandages on her right shoulder and leg, where I had assumed they had removed the glass.

There were tiny cuts everywhere, a large bruise on her head, she was hooked up to multiple machines.

"It's okay," Austin whispered, coming to stand beside me, patting me on the shoulder.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, tears forming in my eyes.

"Dude, it's not your fault, trust me," Austin reassured me, rubbing my back comfortingly.

The four of us hung out in her room, waiting for updates before her parents finally decided to go get food.

"I can't help but feel like shit for this," I sighed leaning forward with my head in my hands.

"If I had just left her alone like she asked she would of never stormed out and this would of never happened," I leaned back wiping my hands on my jeans.

"Drew, you didn't know she was going to storm out, or that this would happen, you were just trying to talk to your girlfriend," Austin said sitting beside me.

"But now I hurt her in more ways then one," I looked over at her lifeless body.

"They said she's okay, so once she's awake talk to her, I bet she'll be more willing to listen," he slightly chuckled trying to make a joke.

I looked over at him with a look that said "really?"

"Sorry, trying to lighten the mood," Austin said in his defense, he had obviously read my look perfectly.

"I'm gonna give you a minute, want anything from the vending machine?" Austin asked as he slowly stood up.

"I'm good," I sighed, "Thanks"

He walked out of the room, taking a second to look at his sister as he passed her bed. He was obviously also scared for her but trying to act strong for his parents and I.

Once he left the room I stood up and walked to her bedside.

I gently brushed a piece of hair out of her face knowing that if she was awake it would of been moved hours ago, she hated when her hair was in her eyes.

I took her hand in mine, my thumb rubbing the back of her hand.

"I'm sorry, please come back to me, I'll fix everything, I'll do whatever you need me to," I whispered, "I love you"

I leaned down and placed a kiss on her forehead.

"Hi," a quiet voice said after a small knock on the door. I sniffled and looked up to see Madelyn.

"I found some friends wondering around," Austin teased standing beside Madelyn.

Austin entered the room, Madelyn following, then Chase, Rudy, Madison and JD all of whom I hadn't seen previously. 

"You all came?" I questioned looking at the five of them.

"Of course," Madelyn smiled standing beside me, giving me a comforting hug, "She's our friend too"

"And we wanted to be here for you two," Chase gestured to Austin and I.

"I brought food," Madison smiled holding up a couple bags.

"Thank you," Austin smiled. 

The seven of us sat in her room for a while, all of them taking their turns talking to Brooklyn, all of us hoping she could hear us.

"You know, if Lyn saw us right now she's tell us all to lighten up," Madison chuckled from the floor.

"She'd tell us to get some drinks in us and to dance," Rudy laughed.

"Or she'd force us to leave because she wouldn't want us waiting around for her," Chase added.

"Sounds like our Lynnie," I smiled thinking about all the good times we had all had together.

We reminisced for a while before they all started to leave.

"Please call if you need anything," Madelyn smiled holding my hands in her's giving them a squeeze, "And I mean anything"

"I will, thank you," I smiled at her.

They all left the room, leaving Austin and I alone with Brooklyn again.

A couple days passed, Brooklyn still not conscious. Anytime I wasn't at an audition or doing post production things for the show I was in her hospital room, hoping and waiting for her to wake up.

No matter what I did or who I was with all I could think about was Brooklyn. I wanted her awake even if she hated me right now. I just wanted her to be okay.

I had been at lunch with Rudy after recording some stuff for the show and the whole time all I could do was worry.

I was able to pull myself out of it to work but after that all I could do was dwell.

Rudy even called me out on it.

"Drew, she's going to be okay"

"I know, everyone keeps saying that," I sighed.

"Than what else is going on?" Rudy asked.

"I just still feel like this is all my fault," I put my head in my hands, trying to hold back tears, I didn't want to cry in public.

"It was all so random, no one could of predicted any of this," Rudy tried to comfort me, "You can't blame yourself for it, you had nothing to do with it"

"But I did, I caused the fight that caused her to storm out"

"Drew," he sighed, "You didn't control the driver who ran the red light"

"Want me to come with you to the hospital after?" he added a second later.

I nodded.

Now it was just another late night at the hospital just waiting for them to kick me out once again.

Since she had been unconscious for three days now they were saying she was officially in a coma and it could last weeks but they were still saying she'd be okay because everything else was fine, they thought it was caused by the impact mixed with how much blood she had lost.

I didn't know how long I could wait, knowing she was going to wake up and probably still hate me.

But part of me knew that she'd want me to just live my life but I couldn't do anything without thinking about her being stuck in this sad, dark room alone.

That's what she wanted isn't it? To be alone.