Break My Heart (Mew x Gulf)

Chapter 42: Break My Heart

Mew lay propped up against the headrest of his bed. A blanket covering him from the waist down and a body beside him.

His head was rested on his sister's shoulder while their hands were clasped beneath the blanket. On his lap was a computer, his eyes never leaving the screen, making sure he didn't miss the subtitles that came up.

He was tired, like someone had put an almost unbearable weight on him. The red rim around his eyes was evidence left of the day he'd had, along with the dull look in his eyes.

Outside the window was only darkness, no remnants left of the bright sky that'd shone earlier this morning. He wanted the light back, maybe then he wouldn't feel so dead and depressed.

Beside him, Siw shifts slightly and it's not long before Mew feels her fingers raking through his hair gently, and he relaxes against her even more, cuddling closer into her side.

"How you feeling? Better?"

He only shrugs, not wanting to use his voice, knowing full well that he would break down again if he did, and the empty feeling in his chest would only grow.

Trying his best to focus on the show they were watching, he releases a soft sigh watching as the main characters lay down together, laughing and smiling as they pass a joint back and forth. And it hurts, because it reminds him of him and Gulf.

Clearing his throat to speak, his voice comes out haorse and just above a whisper. "Do you think Isak and Even lasted?"

Siw's soft chuckle vibrates against him, her hand coming back down to her side. "You ask that every time." Mew shrugs.

"Well I don't know? They're fictional characters, anything could've happened, I guess the ending's up to you."

Mew only hums, their conversation coming to an end and Mew's left to his thoughts, the kind he wanted nothing to do with right now, or ever for that matter.

He remembers arriving home after the long drive, walking up the driveway to the front door, but he couldn't bring himself to reach for his keys, the most he could muster was a knock against the door.

He remembers when his mom opened the door and how she come forward to wrap him in a hug, asking what was wrong, and within a second his eyes were flooded with tears as he held onto her tightly, crying 'why'. He let himself crumble in her arms as they moved to the lounge.

He didn't know how long they stayed like that for with him speaking in broken sentences; 'it happen again', 'why me?' By the time he'd finally calmed down his mom had felt that she knew what'd happened. After all, Mew had only been like that once before.

Siw had been the first to get home from classes, it didn't take her long to figure out what'd happened and she was right by her brother's side.

His father had been next, and though Mew had been sure his mom had informed him that he'd be coming home, he still looked surprised to see him. Unlike his mother and sister he didn't go to comfort or ask him what was wrong, his face had remained impassive. However Mew could see the concern hidden behind that mask of his, and he appreciated it more than anyone would ever know.

For the rest of the day he stayed in his room, only coming out after his mother had forced him to come down and eat something, but otherwise he'd been cooped up in his room. Siw had come through earlier with her computer declaring they were going to watch his favourite show. It was their tradition reserved for times just like this, and it was working, Mew did feel better.

Well, as good as he could feel right now.

As the episode finishes Siw goes to put another one on, and before he knows what he's doing, Mew finds himself opening his mouth to speak, his voice coming out broken and croaked.