Anything For Love[Roger Taylor fan fiction]

A Knock

All your fears from before had just connected all at that moment. 

Your fear of him cheating on you. Of leaving you. You knew you weren't good enough. 

"Do I have to worry about-" You started, your voice caught in your throat. 

You felt like you could barely breathe. A giant word rested on your throat and pushed it down. 

Cheated. 

"No, no, no. I've changed or at least I think I have. I'm not that dude that just shags girls left and right, that's not me anymore." The way he talked didn't seem right. 

He was holding something back. You knew it, he knew it. 

He knew you knew it. Yet he still wasn't saying anything

"Roger?" You asked. You couldn't conjure up anything else to ask. You thought of so many questions you had.

Would you cheat on me? Why did you cheat on her? What aren't you telling me? Roger, what's wrong? Who was the person? Did she know that you had a girlfriend? How did you cheat on her? Did you stay with her long? 

Yet all you could manage to ask was "Roger?" 

He bit his lip and looked around the bedroom. 

He faced the bathroom, sitting up on the bed. 

His bareback faced you. 

His soft and smooth back, you could almost touch it. You just wanted his arms to snake around and hug you. You wish Leah could hug you. Would you ever talk with her again?

Too many things bombarded your head to even comprehend the world around you.

Oh to be the neighbors. Eating breakfast, watching t.v, having sex.

Anything but fighting. You weren't even fighting yet but the words that left Roger's mouth could pretty well compare to a physical attack.

"Ok, it was one kiss. On accident. I was drunk and it-" You interrupted his excuses. 

"What?" Tears streamed your face. 

"When?" So many questions. Almost too many. 

What, how, why, when, where?

"Like after that first date. We had a gig and we got piss drunk and a girl came up and kissed me and I didn't do anything."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't know I had to. I didn't think we were like you know a thing."

"What do you mean we weren't a thing? I specifically asked if we were a thing and you asked if I wanted to be and we both said yes! Was I not clear cause I don't know how much more clear I could've been"

Tears streamed down his face as he realized how hurt you were. How hurt you were because of him. He hurt you and he hurt because he did.

"Did you even wanna be a thing with me?"  You added. Your voice cracked and your eyes blurred. 

"Yes of course! That-it was nothing!"

"Us was just nothing? The first date didn't mean anything?" You slipped out of the bed and he faced you as you now stood at the foot of the bed sliding into a pair of jeans.

"No. The kiss. It was nothing!" He sighed and rethought. 

"I wouldn't want to marry you if I didn't love you. That kiss with that girl wasn't anything. One kiss, that was it. She kissed me." You couldn't process what he was saying. 

Your mind was picking the selective things he was saying and threw them back at you like small sharp knives. 

"I'll see you later." You said opening the bedroom door. You couldn't think of anything else to say. Your cut was brand new and all he was doing was putting salt in it.  

"No please don't leave we can-"

"Rog. We just need some time. I'll see you later." You told him. 

Tears streamed down his face and he nodded with a smile. 

"I love you," he whispered, grasping at straws.

You didn't say anything. 

You gently walked over to him and placed a small goodbye kiss on his cheek.

He held his breath and his hold body was still. He knew what it was. 

You walked down the hall and walked out of the flat.

 You got in your car and decided to drive to Leah's. Yet you couldn't. 

You had no place to go. 

"FUCK FUCK FUCK!" you screamed slamming your hands into the steering wheel of your yellow Ford Pinto. 

It was the only car you ever owned. Your dad bought it for you when you turned 17. The year he got a nice stable job.

You leaned your head on the steering wheel, cautious of the horn. 

You sobbed. 

You sobbed at how much of a dick you were to your best friend. How she was right and he cheated on you. You imaged other things Roger could've done. The lady who kissed him. 

You cried about how you couldn't go to Leah because despite what you told her last night, you needed her. You needed her now. 

You always needed her. 

You needed Roger. You wanted Roger. Would it be too toxic to go back to him? The dooming thought of him cheating on you looming over your head. 

A knock came from the passenger seat window. 

You sniffled and whipped your tears before looking at who it was.

You turned your head to the left where an empty seat sat. 

The beautiful brown-haired friend stood there. 

Slightly mad-looking but also a tinge of sadness. 

"Are you ok?" She asked as she opened the unlocked door. 

You let out a slight laugh. "No." She slid into the seat next to you and closed the door.

"Wanna talk about it?"