The Story Of Us ▸▸ Kellic

❥31

        Kellin

The word horrible couldn't even begin to explain how bad I've felt the past week. Overall, everything has gone to shit, and Monday was the worst. I had to muster up enough energy to get up and go to class, and facing Vic broke my heart. He looked like a stranger. I couldn't read his expression, I couldn't make a guess as to what he was feeling nor what he was thinking. It was a blur, and I hated that. Vic used to be so transparent and now he's not.

He also used to be mine, but I guess that's not the same either.

Part of me is really regretting this break up because it's messing with my head, but then I remember how much we would fight. Did I really want to be in a relationship like that? And did he even deserve that?

Monday went and Tuesday came, and even though I didn't have to look at Vic, I did have to think about him. He was all I could really think about. Nothing else seemed to matter, yet I had a strong feeling that maybe things were going to get worse and it was better to just... Stop. 

The last thing I want is for Vic to flick the switch, and change his love for me to hate. I want us to be friends, and if not that than acquaintances.

This sounds like the beginning all over again.

By Thursday I honestly just felt stupid and I felt like crying. It was hard getting through all my classes when the only thing I seemed to care about was getting the hell out of the lessons and back to my bed. I saw Vic on campus multiple times, but who knows if he was paying any attention. He looked fine; That's why it hurt. He was doing just fine while I was an utter mess.

Sunday came around and I realized that I hadn't even been paying attention to The Story Of Us. I've been dealing with my class work and Vic and I so much that I totally forgot it even existed.

Maybe that's not so bad.

None the less, I didn't hesitate that evening to pull it from the shelf and read all of what I had skipped over until I was deeply engrossed into the future. Nothing of Vic showed up, and that's when I started crying. I let the book control me, and this is what I got out of it; Tears.

I closed the book late that night before going to bed, not even bothering to wipe my eyes anymore because my cheeks didn't stay dry for very long. Instead, I let myself cry onto the pillow almost all of the night. It was hard trying to mentally prepare myself for the morning where I'd have to sit in the same room as Vic for nearly two hours. I wish time could just stop, or better yet rewind. 

I woke up on Monday with a headache, which didn't make me feel any better about what to expect today. Tony had to drag me from the bed to get ready, and he had to make me go to class. In fact, he followed me onto campus, into the building, up the stairs, and to the door where he practically shoved me in. I glanced around the room, noting Vic who was in his usual spot with that Danielle girl beside him. They were smiling at one another, seeming to enjoy themselves. Jealousy stroked my heart, but I kept quiet and trudged to the back where I flung my bag on my desk irritably and sighed. I couldn't keep my eyes off of them. Would it have killed him to not show her affection near me?

Class started, but I just didn't have it in me to listen. I couldn't care when I had so much on my mind. I laid my head down on the desk, closing my eyes. I thought about Vic who felt so far away, even though he was a mere three rows up. I peered up a little bit later, noting that Danielle had scooted closer to him. His hand rested on the back of her chair. Did the teacher notice? Who cares, but I did, and I had enough. Without warning, I stood up from my desk and started packing my bags.

"Kellin?" Mrs. Trevoli questioned. Everyone turned their attention to me, even Vic. I locked my gaze with his, and I could've broke down then and there, but I didn't. I felt numb, like I couldn't cry anymore. But I could do one thing, and that was act out. I'm good at that. "Kellin, where are you going?" Mrs. Trevoli questioned yet again as I started towards the door. A thought crossed my mind, so I stopped, turned around, placed my bag on my desk, and walked towards Vic who seemed baffled. A smile crept onto my lips, but it was more so of a sad smile; Or a bitter one. Slowly, I leaned down next to his chair, keeping completely silent. I pointed to Danielle who raised her eyebrows at me before I indicated a blow job with my head, popping my mouth and standing up. A smirk was most likely stuck on my face, but Vic was blushing and looked really angry at me. I didn't care.

"Kellin, you need to leave."

"I'm aware, it seems I need to leave a lot of things." I shot back, looking at Vic. He clenched his jaw, seeming to try and keep his anger subsided. 

"Leave." Mrs. Trevoli ordered. I nodded, but I didn't feel like I was done.

"Have fun with that doll." I whispered to Vic who looked even more upset after that. I left the room slowly, feeling satisfied with what I said. But after the door slammed shut and class went back to normal, I broke down. Tears fell from my eyes with ease, ones that I thought I didn't have in me. I hurried down the stairs and shoved past a few people before I was outside and took a seat against the building, wiping at the tears. I knew what I did was somewhat unfair, but I couldn't help but to do it either. Silently, I rested my head against the wall and looked at the sky. 

The class ended and everyone shuffled out the doors, paying very little attention to me, except for one person; Vic. He looked pissed, maybe even more than he did in class. Before I could snap at him, Vic latched onto my wrist harshly and yanked me up, pulling me off towards a nearby alley. My skin got hot from his touch, but it wasn't the same feeling as before. In fact, I was actually kind of scared. Without warning, Vic pushed me a little roughly against the alley wall, still latching onto my wrists tightly.

"What the hell was that?" He spat angrily, searching my eyes for an answer. Never in my life had I ever felt so small. "Don't just stand there, explain!" He yelled again, pushing me against the wall harder.

"You're hurting me." I whispered. Immediately, Vic loosened his grip and stepped back. I rubbed my wrists soothingly.

"Why did you do that in class? Do you know how embarrassing that was?" He yelled, though he seemed to be somewhat more calm.

"I don't like her, okay?" I yelled back. Silence filled the gap between us. "I don't want you to be with her." I admitted.

"Then who do I be with? No one? Because you're the one who broke up with me."

"I didn't think you'd move on so fast. Did you even care?" I yelled this time.

"Why the hell would you think I didn't care? I don't even want Danielle, in fact I still want all of you because you're the only one I can actually say I love." Vic yelled back, but the tension felt heavier now. I didn't know what to say. Vic stepped forward a little, locking his gaze with mine. "If you didn't want me to move on, then you shouldn't have hurt me. And if you're trying to hurt me back because you're upset, you brought it on yourself." He whispered irritably, but turning and walking away from me, leaving me in a  state of shock. Never had I been so tongue tied. Instead of going after Vic, I hurried back home and collapsed on the couch. 

What the hell could've I said?

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