The Woman in the Letter

CHAPTER 1 - Letters which should have burned PART 1

NATALIE

I hate loud music. But I don't remember ever being so tense. Lately, everything has been bothering me. The sound of the printer in the office, the sound of phone messages, meetings at work, even people's conversations ... Even ... Even His voice ... I wanted to go out and take a deep breath. But I could not move because I had to meet the guests. Like all sisters, I had to fulfill my role as a sister, welcoming guests on my brother's happiest day, smile and looking as happy as possible.

I took a sip of the wine. I continued to greet the newcomers, smiling at the guests. Often, I tried to stretch the corner of a dark red dress that was too tight for my body. My dress was not too tight when I bought it a month before the wedding. Later, my eating habits changed. At night, I prepared sandwiches for myself in front of the refrigerator and ate them without any regret. I did not object to any request of my stomach. Eating reduced my stress and guilt.

As I walked down the white marble hallway, I could feel his eyes on me, and it made me very tense. I looked around. He was not visible around. I prayed to God for him to leave. But a gentle touch on my left hand made me realize that, as usual, my prayers were not being answered.

"I'm looking for you everywhere," he said, closing the top button of his black jacket.

"I have been welcoming the guests for a long time. I'm tired of running around" I replied without looking into his eyes. I did not dare to look at his face.

When I looked up at his face, the gleam in his eyes made my body tremble. For a moment I felt like the worst, most unfaithful person in the world. The last time I felt this feeling was in the criticism I heard as a child after I made mistakes without the consent of my parents.

He looked into my eyes and squeezed a small piece of paper in my hand. For some reason, it was still nice to squint his dark brown eyes and watch the usual soft smile on his face.

He straightened his messy hair with his hands and looked around, saying, "Try reading now." "I'll be waiting for you behind the restaurant"

He kissed me on the cheek. After moving away from me, I squeezed the paper with all my might. I hold myself not to throw the small letter to the ground. He didn't know that I hadn't kept the love letters he had written to me for the last 11 days. He didn't even know that I was thinking of burning what I had kept until then.