If It Means A Lot To You... (Frerard)

(23.) Death Is In The Air

{A/N Pretty much the end of the Trenton feels, WeW}

About a month later, Trenton's funeral took place. I wore black skinny jeans, a white button up shirt, and a black waistcoat.

Frank came with me and we drove in my mom's car. I was silent through the whole ride, looking out the window at the gentle snowfall.

Frank held my hand the entire time, rubbing circles on it. My stomach filled with dread when we reached the funeral place.

I let go of Frank's hand briefly to get out of the car. As soon was we were both out of the car, however, I grabbed onto his hand again.

My mom led us into the room with her head down. I knew she was crying. My mother and Trenton's mom had become very good friends over the past nine years, of course she'd grieve for him.

I had already given Trenton's note to his dad. Now they looked at me with sympathy in their eyes knowing I felt guilty for his death.

Me and Frank took our seats in the front row of the room and I glanced around at the people here.

Most of the gathering was Trenton's family, all his aunts and uncles and cousins. I did see Vincent and Joshua walk in.

Vincent had tears rolling down his face and his hand was clutched onto Joshua's. Joshua looked more stable than his boyfriend.

There were tears forming in his eyes, but he didn't let them fall.

The couple saw me watching and walked over to us. As soon as Vincent took the other seat next to me, he started crying, putting his head in his hands.

Joshua put his arm around Vincent and pulled him closer to him. "G-Gerard, I-I r-read his n-note." Vincent sniffed, he was choking on his tears.

I was crying myself as I said, "I was the first person to find out, I read the note myself." I broke down in tears and Frank pulled me towards him so I was leaning on his shoulder.

"Why didn't Trenton tell us?" Vincent choked out.

"I don't know, Vince," I sighed. "If he did we could have helped him."

But he hadn't, so there was nothing we could do now.

*****&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&*****

They had me come up to speak about Trenton. I told everyone that me and him and been friends for nine years, and I had no idea what he was feeling then.

I'd choked up at the end and Frank came and got me off the podium.

Trenton's mother came up to speak too. She talked about how hard it was for her to lose two children.

Everyone was crying, you could here their sobs every time someone finished speaking or took a pause in their speech.

After the funeral, there was to be a party. I saw no point in that. Why should there be a party when somebody just died?

The whole party, me and Frank just sat on the couch with Rainie, my head leaning on my boyfriend's shoulder.

Rainie didn't seem to like the concept of having a party either, she just sat on the couch sniffing quietly. When she got tired, I let her lean on my shoulder to sleep.

{This will be the end of the really really Trenton feelies.

This whole thing was an emotional rollercoaster omf

It's not the end of the story, I have so much planned for this still.

Thx fr putting up with my feels : )

ily5% :3}

~Carry On~

Ari Thomas<3