Friends of mine.

Chapter Twenty four.

(this will definitely be the longest fanfic i'll do, i hope you all don't mind it being long!)

Confusion eventually led to frustration and anger over the course of days Nick has been gone, being upset and angry was all I could feel, only because he never said one word to me or anyone before he left, and I seemed to be the only one who found it strange.
Although he always goes to see his mum after we come back from being away, it's only ever a few days, but it's been more than a week now and he still hasn't returned, I haven't received one phone call since he left, it only made me worse, battling with the fear maybe this is my fault, for whatever reason I don't know, and I'm too afraid to know.

"Andy. Andy!"

"Fuck! Do you have to?!"
I screech, stepping out of my daydream, not particularly a dream but more of my own thoughts swallowing me whole.

"I'm trying to talk to you. This is the third time you've zoned out."
I take a deep breath, sitting back in my seat, trying to relax again, my heart beating far too quickly.
I rub my eyes, I completely forgot Simon was even at my house, nothing really mattered to me, it all led to knowing if Nick was alright, that's what mattered. Without him being here with me like usual, nothing feels right.

"I'm sorry alight? I can't focus."

"And why's that?"

He knows just the reason why. I hate how everyone still asks me that damn question knowing exactly why I can't focus, all that is on my mind is wanting to call Nick and ask if he's okay and when he'll be home.

"Just leave it, Charley."
I sigh, lighting a cigarette to distract myself from my own thoughts.
I feel bad for the way I speak to the rest of them sometimes, I only do it when I'm annoyed or anxious, I can't help it, I wish I could.

"No, I'm not going to leave it. You've been doing this too much now."
He says, sitting forward in his seat, making me feel agitated, my blood begins to boil with his tone and words.

"Fucking hell."
I hiss, getting up from my seat, I turn to the window, taking quick swigs of my beer. I didn't want to look at him and I didn't want to talk about anything, it has all built up and the only one I can imagine talking to is Nick.
I hear Simon groan from behind me, and I again feel guilt for the way I reacted, but after all the anger I have felt these past few days, sometimes I blame it on Nick.
For the past few days I got angry, telling myself it was his fault for treating my the way he did in that hotel room then not explaining himself, making me worried sick, and to only make it worse go off drinking himself silly with drugs to top it off.
Or maybe I'm the problem, maybe I shouldn't worry so much about him, maybe I should learn to give him space, like the rest of them always tell me to. Although it's not that easy when it's someone you deeply care about, drifting from Nick is something I have nightmares about, it gives me this awful feeling and I want it to go away, I want Nick.

"Maybe we should go out? Get some air or something, just to clear your head a bit, yeah?"
I hear Simon mumble cautiously, not wanting me to throw another tantrum, and I don't blame him. It only makes me feel worse when he's still being kind to me after me reacting like this, I can tell he's trying to keep me calm.

I think about it for a while, keeping my eyes out the window with my back turned to him, it's probably for the best I do, he's right, I need to clear my mind; any chance to get Nick out of it, I'll take that chance.