Un-Arranged Love

Chapter 57

Alex POV

When she left, I basically stayed in my bedroom. My life had no meaning if she didn't exist in it. My heart had been broken. Broken, to the point that I had given up on life, work and my studies. How could she be so selfish as to make this choice for me? Why wasn't my word enough for her? To make matters worst, when I eventually got round to this shitty reality we call life I went round to the Khans residence to tutor the twins and was surprised to see a 'For Sale' sign up in the front garden. It was as if they just wanted to wipe any connection I had to Alaya. When I had asked Mrs Khan why they were selling, she said that the house no longer felt like a home since that night. It didn't feel right to stay after Alaya left, so they decided to relocate to another city and only visit once the trial began. I tried to find out from Mrs Khan where Alaya had gone to. I needed to find out so I could convince her to give us a try, but Mrs Khan refused to budge, claiming that Alaya had requested her not to share that information with anyone.

Life seemed to have lost its meaning and purpose. My mother and Amar had come to see me because I hadn't called or texted them in a long time. I cried on my mother's shoulder when they unexpectedly arrived to visit. My mother continued telling me that if I was supposed to be with Alaya, something would happen to bring us together again. How can we be together when I have no idea where she has gone? My bedroom floor was covered in photographs I took of her on my camera during our trip to the art institute. I was lucky enough to capture these. She was smiling in every photograph I looked at. This was how I needed to remember her, to keep her memory alive. I tried to be angry with her but I couldn't. My love for her deepened even more each time I tried.

************

2 MONTHS LATER

It had been sixty-two days since Alaya had left me. I despised my life. Every day became a routine: get up, go to Uni, sketch for a few hours, eat, work, and then go to bed. I grew estranged from everyone and everything. I desired to be alone, to wallow in my own pain. Within a few weeks of putting their house on the market, the Khans had sold it. It was as if they didn't exist since, like her, they vanished within a week of the sale being completed. They too had disappeared with no one knowing where they had gone.

I sat in class, musing, staring at a painting on the wall that Alaya had produced. "Mr Scott, might I have a moment with you please?" Professor Green requested, startling me out of my daydream as the bell rang to signal the completion of our class.

"Of course, Professor," I replied as I sat in my seat, waiting for the other students to exit the class.

"Mr. Scott I've seen a drop in the quality of your work. The work you've recently submitted hasn't been up to par with what I've come to expect from you. Is something the matter?", he inquired, his expression filled with real concern.

"Professor Green, please accept my apologies. I'm ok. I've got a lot going on lately. I promise to put more effort in my work." I said hastily, and stood up so I could leave the room quickly.

"Does the thing taking up your time have anything to do with Alaya?" he questioned, his brows wrinkled and a worried expression on his face. I was in great torment just by him mentioning her name. I slumped back into my chair, frustrated. Was my sorrow so obvious? I'll never be able to get over her, will I? Even just thinking about her made me feel bleak.

"Mr Scott, I didn't mean to upset you. Can I offer you some advice?", he requested, to which I replied with a puzzled expression and a nod. He came closer to me, and sat on the edge of the desk, his hands clasped at the table's side.

"About two months ago, Alaya came to me. I phoned her around the time of the assault because she hadn't been to class in a while. She intended to leave university. I convinced her to stay despite her obvious deterioration. She told me she couldn't face returning to university and feeling like she'd be a subject for everyone's scrutiny. The fact that she didn't want you to have to defend her every time someone said something to her struck me the most. She said this made her feel guilty for putting you in that position. She wished for you to focus on your studies with no distractions because she wanted you to succeed in life. At her request, I called a few of my contacts and made plans for her to undertake her course online while also doing an internship in another city. You see, I want not only for you to succeed, but also for her to finish her education and not allow that dreadful night to define her. She needed a fresh start somewhere else to do that." He said to me. I was taken aback by this revelation and the fact that I had been completely unaware of this.

"Professor, so you know where she is then? She didn't even let me decide what I wanted. Of course, if someone had said something to her, I would have defended her. I fucking love her! And she... she just left", I remarked a little louder than I meant to. My frustration coming through.

"Are you listening to me, boy? She was well aware that you would have stayed with her. She didn't want to feel guilty about your decision to stay. Do you believe she didn't love you?", he continued, attempting to make his point. "Mr Scott, believe me when I say that if there's one thing that girl has done for you, it's she's loved you. Don't make the mistake of thinking what she did was easy. I could see the anguish in her eyes. You are her weakness, and she knew she'd never be able to move forward while she remained with you. She is, as you know, in a dark place. Alaya requires healing, something you cannot provide for her. She needs to do that herself, at her own pace."

"She didn't want me to fall into that dark place? Well, I'm there right now! I'm so angry with her! What harm would it have done for me to know where she went or what her plans were? She just left and its as if there is no trace of her left anywhere. Just what's in here!" I said this while pointing to my heart in my chest. "What am I supposed to do now?" I inquired further.

"Why don't you start by fulfilling her wishes. Finish your studies and get out there and live your life."   Professor Green advised.  

"You say, Professor, that she wanted me to finish my degree and live my life. But how can I accomplish it if she's not there? My heart has been crushed. This is the first time I've ever experienced such agony. You claim she did it for me, but all she did was break me."  My emotions were getting the best of me, so I asked. I knelt down with my hands in my hair, attempting to hide my emotions from the Professor.

"Alex, you are a bright student, but you have let me down today. Why don't you follow through on her request? It'd be as though you were paying tribute to your love for her. Just because one chapter of your relationship has come to an end doesn't mean another won't begin. Allow her to heal. I am confident you'll cross paths again one day. She'll have healed and returned to being her own person." As he tapped my shoulder to console me, the Professor commented.

I raised my head since what he said seemed truthful. She needed to heal in order to reclaim her identity. Perhaps if she was in a better place, she'd come back to me.

"Do you honestly believe me and her will cross paths again?" I questioned the Professor, hoping it was true.

"Alex, I promise you this much: that girl loves you more than you love her," he said.

Please comment and vote- S