Un-Arranged Love

Chapter 55

Alaya POV

Alex had been coming to my house after university every day. It was the only reason I looked forward to waking up every day knowing he would come sit with me. Alex tried to make small talk with me in order to make me smile. I appreciated his efforts to make me feel better, but something always brought me back to that horrible night. With my depressed attitude, I felt like I was constantly bringing down his charming personality. He didn't deserve to be apart of this world I lived in now.

That week, I had to go to the Sexual Assault Referral Unit to have a pregnancy test carried out. I was accompanied by Alex. I'm not sure why, but I preferred him over my parents as a companion. The humiliation I felt in front of my parents was something I couldn't escape. Despite the fact that they knew it wasn't my fault, I felt I had let them down.

Ilene greeted us and led us to a room with a plaque bearing the name Dr Stevens on the door. The room was identical to the one I had been in a few weeks before, all white with that clinical smell I remembered well. There was a desk and seats were positioned around it, which we sat on. To the side, there was a bed with a curtain. I was not looking forward to being here. It was bringing back memories of that night. Alex sensed my uneasiness as I stood up, unsure of what to do. He rose up as well, reaching for my hand and clasping it in his while wrapping me with his arm. "Alaya, take a deep breath for me. I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere." He said to me. I gave him a half-smile as I stared at him.

 I was asked to pee in a container and give it to the nurse. Dr Stevens reappeared around twenty minutes later, holding a notepad and a pen in her arm. She was dressed in a long white jacket. I didn't get a good look at her last time due to my eyes were swollen shut. She was a slender, tall woman in her late forties, with blonde hair pulled back into a bun and bright red glasses.

"Hello Alaya. How have you been?", she inquired, her voice concerned, as she motioned for me to take a seat next to her desk.

"Not good, Dr Stevens. It's been a difficult few weeks. I'm sorry, but can you please give me the results. I just want to go home." I responded quickly, so I could get out of there.

"Of course, Alaya. The results from the pregnancy test have come back negative. The results for STI's has also come back negative. I'm sure that will bring some relief to you. Do you have any questions you want to ask me?" Dr Stevens inquired, a small smile on her face.

"So I'm not pregnant." I said it with tears in my eyes and a genuine smile on my face, a genuine sense of relief on my face.

"No Alaya, you are not", Dr Stevens said. I could tell she was pleased to tell me this since she sensed my reaction.

"Thank God. I wasn't sure if I could handle the test being positive. I am so relieved."  My tears got the best of me once more as I responded.

"Are you all right?" Alex inquired as he squeezed my hand gently.

I reacted with a nod and the words, "more then okay Alex. Can you take me home, please?"

Alex and I had taken a taxi home. I couldn't bear going on a bus and walking up my street with my neighbours staring and whispering about me. I was already feeling like a freak in a circus show. However, this didn't seem to stop the neighbours. We were dropped off a few doors away from my house by the taxi. Mrs Choudhry came outside, appearing to be tending to the flower pots in her front garden, as if she had been waiting for our return. She was the leader of the gossip gang. If you wanted word to spread, it was her you told it to. She lived on her own and had enough time on her hands to meddle in other people's lives. I never liked it when my mother would talk to her.

As I passed by, I tried not to make eye contact with her. "Oh Alaya dear, it's great to see you out and about. How have you been coping since that night? You don't look so good. So, where are you two returning from?", she inquired, her tone casual, as if she were just looking for some gossip with a pity expression on her face.

My anxiety was building and I was becoming agitated. My body began to shake as sweat collected on my forehead. I froze because I couldn't think of anything to say. This is how things are going to be. Everyone here is aware of what happened to me. These are the kinds of questions that will constantly be thrown at me. I'll never be able to find any sense of peace because these people will never let me forget.

"No where special. We need to go inside. Alaya's parents are expecting her. Good-bye!" Alex interjected, as he could see my reaction. Mrs Choudhry was not pleased with Alex's response and simply twitched her lips before returning to her house.

That evening when Alex left I came to the realisation that I couldn't live here anymore. I couldn't put Alex through that, every time someone asked me a question. It wasn't fair on him to fight my battle for me. I had to learn to stand up for myself. In order to that I needed to leave this city and move elsewhere. Somewhere, no one knew me. I needed to go somewhere where I could just be a nobody and not be hounded by glances and murmurs.

I had to leave! That meant leaving my family and Alex. 

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