Behind Closed Doors

22. All Good Things

March 2016

"Soh basically.......when you told me I had time to chill out and do as I pleased you just were havin' a laugh?" Zayn quipped, feeling his blood begin to boil.

He was on the phone with his manager, Sarah. She'd called to tell him he needed to meet up with G and be papped with her.

Zayn heard her sigh into the phone, her impatience with him beginning to show. "I don't see what the problem is Zayn. Honestly, I thought you enjoyed being with Gigi. I even remember you thanking me for choosing her."

This time it was Zayn's turn to sigh. He couldn't tell her the real reason why he didn't wanna leave London, so he caved. "I do..... I do. Okay. Tell me where I need to goh and give me all the details. Don't leave anything out, Sarah. I want to know these things. Stop trying to keep 'em from me until the last minute soh I have noh choice."

After getting off the phone with her, Zayn walked back into Harry's bedroom. He now felt a heaviness in his heart he hadn't just before his call. It was almost as bad as when he'd left the band and realized Harry didn't want to speak to him.

Zayn and Harry had spent the past 3 days glued to each other's sides. They only separated to take work calls and drive separately to one another's homes. They'd been having a lot of sex. Like a lot. They had a years worth to make up for. When they weren't having sex they were sharing new music they'd discovered, catching each other up on their time apart, and reminiscing about old memories they shared.

Zayn looked upon a sleeping Harry, spread eagle atop the bed completely naked. He'd thought they'd have a week at least, but he knew deep down that was wishful thinking. They were both busy men with schedules that didn't often allow the luxury of a break for more than 3 days. Zayn's schedule was only going to become more intense as he began promoting the album tenfold.

Harry looked so peaceful when he slept. Though the years had treated him kindly and he'd aged into a beautiful godlike young man, Zayn still saw the carefree 16 year old with slightly chunky cheeks and an innocence that made him smile every time Harry slept.

Harry honestly hadn't changed a whole lot when it came to his personality, something Zayn silently thanked God for. He still thought puns and knock knock jokes were hilarious, still spoke in the same slow drawl, he had maintained his ability to find joy in the most dire of situations, and Harry still blushed when Zayn complimented him. Spending the past few days with Harry had made Zayn realize how truly amazing the man was. He was always amazing but somehow Zayn seemed to have forgotten how unworldly Harry was and how much better Zayn began to feel being in his presence. Zayn felt his level of happiness increase when he was with Harry. Harry felt like sunshine on an otherwise overcast day. Zayn had received a sliver of light through the clouds by being with Harry recently and it made his entire being warm with relief from the feel of it.

The longer he watched Harry the more panicked he began to feel as reality hit him, knowing the clouds would soon cover his sunlight once more, making it all but lost. They hadn't talked about plans for the future or what their reunion meant for either of them. Zayn had a commitment to Gigi now, contractually and emotionally. He couldn't just drop her like an old pair of shoes. She'd been good to him and helped him begin to heal from the damage he'd left when leaving One Direction. Now that they'd become public, Zayn had to worry about all the people who adored Zigi and wished to see them succeed. Gigi had much more to lose since Zayn's name was far more prevalent than her own. How could Zayn do that to her? Take it all away when she was just starting to reap the benefits. He couldn't do that.

So where did that leave Harry? Zayn had nothing more to offer him than he had a year prior. In many ways he had even less to offer now. Previously, their breakups or little tiffs never scared Zayn to the breaking point. He'd always had the luxury of knowing he'd still see Harry nearly every day. If things were wrong it never lasted long because they couldn't get away from the other. When Zayn and Harry are forced to be in each other's presence, they both know damn well one of them would cave and they'd be in each other's arms before long.