team effort - rafe cameron 3

sixteen

the rest of the weekend flew by, my mom, JJ and i all worked hard and finished the painting and putting the sign up. today had been the grand reopening and it'd been a great turn out, we had great business all day. but now, it was close to midnight and i was sat out on the balcony. my mom and JJ were both fast asleep in their rooms.

i was staring out at the water, watching the small waves hit the boat at the end of our dock. it was starting to drizzle and you could hear the fine rain drops hit the roof. i pulled my sweater tighter around my body as a breeze pushed through.

i hadn't seen rafe since the restaurant the other night. i hadn't seen anyone. JJ hadn't either, he hadn't heard from any of them, not even katie. he was kind of upset, and as much as i tried to play it off like i didn't care, i did. they were probably all surrounding cami and the baby, which i understand, but they were supposed to be my friends too. it made me feel stupid, and more and more like i was just cami's replacement. i was a place holder until the queen herself arrived back in town.

i pushed myself up and over to the railing, placing my hands gently on it as the rain picked up. i heard laughing and looked over to topper's backyard where it had come from. i saw sarah and john b, standing in the rain as they laughed. then i watched someone run out, shoving john b in to the pool. they turned and revealed her perfect smile, cami.

"hey!" john b said. "what was that?"

"swimming! duh!" cami replied.

i sighed and shook my head. even at my own house, i was swallowed by her. this was her goddamn house first, why was i living in it? i turned and walked back inside. i pushed the door shut and locked it. i went down the stairs and shut all the lights off, including the backyard lights before locking the door. i went over to the kitchen, grabbing a water bottle and headed up the stairs before i looked up, seeing JJ appear at the top.

"oh, hey..." he trailed.

"hey," i said.

"i was uh, i was just coming down to get some water."

"if you're going next door, just say that." i said.

"is that okay with you?"

"by all means." i motioned for him to pass me. he walked down the stairs, stopping at the bottom and looking at me.

"you can come too." he said. "they're all over there and i'm sure they'd love to see you."

"no," i shook my head. "i don't want to force them to see me."

"i'm sorry," he said.

"don't be, it's fine. i'm really tired anyway." i shrugged. "go out the back, i already locked the door but you can leave it unlocked, even if you don't come back tonight."

"thanks," he nodded. i finished the stairs and went into my room. i pulled my sweater off, hanging it up in my closet before i changed. i went over to my window, going to pull the curtains shut when i looked over to topper's yard again, catching a glimpse of rafe grabbing her waist, spinning her in the rain. what a fucking cliché, but god how much i wished that was me. i pulled the curtains shut and walked over, climbing in bed, plugging my phone in before going to instagram.

i got curious and went to cami's page. her profile picture was now updated, a new picture of her and rafe. i scrolled down and saw a new post, this was a picture of rafe holding a baby, smiling wide. i felt my stomach turn and my heart drop. i scrolled, looking at the caption which read, "sadie finally meeting her daddy."

i locked my phone and rolled on my back, staring up at the ceiling for a little bit as i tried to clear my head enough to sleep. i wasn't sure how long i'd been lying there before my bedroom door flew open. i looked over, seeing a figure through the dark. i sat up quickly as they pushed the door shut, moving over closer to me. and with the tiny sliver of moonlight, i made the face out to be topper.

"what are you doing here?" i asked.

"i wanted to check on you." he said, sitting on the bed and pulling his hood off.

"why?"

"because i know it's a lot to take in, watching the person you love, love someone else." he said. "i've done it twice and it's not easy."

"no kidding." i shook my head. "and i'm not angry, i'm not, i totally get it. they were in love and she didn't have a choice to leave. she had his kid and it's a lot, and they need to do it together without another party involved, but..."

"but you're angry because it's not fair, you love him too." topper nodded.

"i never told him." i shook my head.

"never told him what?"

"i never told him i loved him. he came to the restaurant and kissed me goodbye, told me he wasn't lying when he said he loved me, and i let him walk away without saying i loved him too. he probably thinks i just don't care."

he watched me, "he doesn't think you love him, ains. he thinks that you hate him, actually. he thinks you hate cami too."

"i do hate cami." i said. "i don't want to, i'm sure she's amazing but her chance with rafe was cut short, and it wasn't her fault, but that's got to mean something."

"it doesn't matter, she had his baby."

"i know she had his baby." i sighed.

"what was your connection to gracelynn?" he asked.

"what?"

"with cami, she had an ex who killed himself and she told rafe that he was probably somewhere watching dogs do sploots. gracelynn, before she died, always talked about wanting a corgi because she loved the way they sploot. that was their connection and why rafe really fell in love with her. he thought it was gracelynn telling him it was okay. what was your connection?"

"the night gracelynn died, they slow danced to Enchanted by Taylor Swift." i said.

"yeah," he nodded.

"the night at the charity thing, where i was his date, we slow danced to the same song." i looked at him.

"that feels like a bigger connection than just some dog sploots."

"it doesn't matter about connections though, they've got a kid."

"kids don't always mean that the two people are meant for each other. you should know that, ains."

"yeah, but i'm going to let them figure that out before i get involved." i shook my head. "that's their job, their problem, not mine."

"you sure you don't want to come over?" he asked. "we can smoke some blunts and drink some beers, crash out in my basement."

i smiled, "i'm okay."

"alright," he leaned over and kissed my cheek. "goodnight."

"goodnight, top." i replied. he got up and moved out of my room as i laid back, staring up again.

"hey, lynn." i said softly. "if there's anything you know, that i don't, give me a sign."

that's when there was a loud boom outside, and a flash of light as i jumped, looking over, then back up.

"was that you?"

there was some thunder growling as i felt chills all over my body.

"no," i shook my head and rolled over, pulling the covers over my head. "i'm going crazy, i'm going fucking nuts."