The Lockdown

12

Andy woke up rested, he could not recall the last time sleep felt this good. His bedside clock read nine am, he figured they both needed the rest. Cam was still asleep on top of him, his head on his chest. He slowly started stirring, gradually waking up with a yawn. "Good morning," Andy greeted him. The youngster held onto him but slightly raised his head and looked at the older man.

"You kissed me."

"Yes."

"And I kissed you back."

"Yes."

"Are we both naked?"

"Yes."

"Are we in your bed?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Because you wouldn't let go of me last night."

"Oh... sorry?"

"Nothing to be sorry about." They were both silent for a minute.

"What's next?" Cam asked finally.

"Breakfast?" Andy suggested.

"That's not what I meant but I am famished."

"So let's get up."

"No."

"You get up and make breakfast?"

"No."

"Okay, I will get up and make breakfast."

"No."

"Why?"

"Because then I will have to let go of you."

"I'll come back."

Cam grumbled but slowly released Andy. "You'd better."

Andy put on a pair of boxers, went into the kitchen and contemplated making a huge breakfast but he already missed the warmth of the bed and the boy waiting for him so he just threw two frozen waffles into the toaster, got a couple of bananas and a bottle of orange juice from the fridge, put everything on a tray and returned to the bedroom in less than five minutes.

Cam looked at the meager offerings. "You really are a terrible cook."

"That has been well established," Andy conceded the obvious.

After they finished eating, they lay down on the bed facing each other. Cam repeated his earlier question. "What's next?"

"I would like to stay in bed with you all day."

Cam groaned. "Be serious."

"I am."

"I meant what's next with us?"

Andy sighed deeply. "I don't know. You have to be patient with me, this is pretty new to me."

"Do you want to have sex with me?"

'Yes."

"I can't do that."

"Why?"

"I can't just have sex."

"Neither can I. Not with you."

"What do you mean?"

"I want more than that. I want to wake up next to you tomorrow morning as well. And the day after that. Whenever I look at you I stop worrying about the lockdown, about the bar or the future. Your smiles cheer me up, your anguish hurts me deep inside. You make my life better, you make me better."

"I am afraid."

"Of what?"

"That you will hurt me."