Faded Memories|| PJMxKTH ||BTS Fanfiction

PART 19: THE CONFESSION

[Present]
We both are sitting on the beach, the waves washing over our feet as he tells me about our story.I'm hugging my knees,feeling totally overwhelmed.Millions of emotions are running inside me.It's a whole story .A whole relationship.Growing and thickening and turning into something so strong like loving someone more than Jimin.

"What about…...after that?" I say,eventually."How did we realise we were in love?"

"We started spending a lot of time since we went to that beach.We were together almost all the time.We went to so many places together.Every time we used to go out,I had to buy you new elastics because you'd always lose yours.After some time,I started stuffing some extras in my pocket." He stuffs his hand in his pocket and takes out 3 more elastics.He shakes his head while chuckling,I bite my lip,trying not to laugh at this.

He stuffs them back and then lowers his voice."You were in denial for a long time,you know? Because you never thought you could love someone after Jimin.But eventually……." He trails off and lifts his dark eyes to mine and I feel a lurch,deep inside."We both knew it was inevitable" he says,softly.

I'm transfixed.He moves a little closer and removes my hands from my knees and take them in his hands.

“Y/n…” He brings my hands up to his mouth, closing his eyes, gently kissing them. “I knew…” His voice is muffled against my skin. “You’d come back. I knew you’d come back to me.”

“Stop it!” I whip my hands away and get up,my heart thudding in distress. “You don’t…you don’t know anything!”
“What’s wrong?” Taehyung looks shell-shocked as though I’d hit him.He gets up as well.
I almost don’t know what’s wrong with me. I want him so badly; my entire body’s telling me to go for it. But I can’t.
“What’s wrong is…I’m freaked.”

“By what?” He looks dumbfounded.

“By all this! Our relationship! It’s too much. You’re presenting me with this…this fully fledged relationship. But for me, it’s just the beginning.” I take a deep breath, trying to keep my cool. “I’m too many steps behind. It’s too unbalanced.”

“We’ll balance it,” he says quickly. “We’ll work it out. I’ll go back to the beginning too.”

“You can’t go back to the beginning!” I thrust my hands hopelessly through my hair. “Taehyung, you’re a guy who’s attractive and witty and cool. And I really like you. But I don’t love you. How could I? I haven’t done all this.I haven't gone to beaches with you,I didn't spend my days and nights with you. I don’t remember all this.”
“I don’t expect you to love me—”

“Yes, you do. You do! You expect me to be her.”
“You are her.” There’s a sudden streak of anger in his voice. “Don’t give me this bullshit. You’re the girl I love. Believe it, Y/n.”
“I don’t know!” My voice rises in agitation. “I don’t know if I am, okay? Am I her? Am I me?”
To my horror, tears are streaming down my face; I have no idea where they came from. I turn away and wipe my face, gulping, unable to stop the torrent.

I want to be her, I want to be the girl laughing on the tree trunk. But I’m not.

At last I manage to get a grip on myself and turn around. Taehyung is standing in exactly the same place as he was before, a bleakness on his face that makes my heart constrict.

“I look around at the photos at your house." I swallow hard. "And all my things there. I hear your stories about us And I can see that it happened.I am really really thankful for what you have done for me in the past year even though I don't remember it. But it looks like a wonderful romance between two people I don’t know.”