Want

Chapter 12

Her body shivered and her head pounded slightly before she gasped and sprung up from her bedsheets, her arm blindly reached out to the other side of her bed but no one was there, Kian wasn't there. It all came flooding back to her when she realised she went borderline psycho on him and for what reason? Was Kian being around her causing her to get stressed to the brink because she was so in love with him? It hurt so bad especially as she was wrapped up in his shirt, the duvet providing much-needed warmth from the chill of her room. Maybe she didn't know how to love anymore, maybe that was the problem but she knew the actual problem was her life was filled to the brim with maybes. Jac's bare legs stretched along the soft sheets and she woke before frowning at the bottle of whisky that was on her bedside table, she sighed and her eyes widened noticing half the bottle was missing. The love she had for Kian was causing her to break internally and that bottle of whisky on the side confirmed that for her. But why did it matter? She knew she was too far gone now, hooked on Kian so much so she needed to run away, it was her racing heart, her pounding head and the inability to think clearly that made her feel thie was the right thing to do. The doorbell went off and she groaned quietly chucking her dressing gown on, she sighed in annoyance at the babysitter who had met Jonny to collect Emma for her, how did she manage to forget all about that? Kian, obviously. He was on her mind twenty-four hours of the day. She cursed herself and thanked the babysitter, Emma launched herself into her mother's arms and Jac hugged her tightly. A thought came into her head, she sighed slightly and shook her head at the thought of running away.

"Mummy where are we going?" Emma demands and Jac sighs bending down in front of her, she kisses Emma on the head

"We just need to do something important ok and then I will be all yours baby" Jac runs her fingers through her daughter's hair "I promise"

"Ok" Emma responds dismissively before heading to play with some of her toys, Jac sighs slightly and heads into the bathroom to get ready, she returns and Emma walks over to her

"I was thinking that we should go on holiday," Jac says quietly and Emma nods eagerly "Just me and you"

"What about work?" Emma asks quietly and Jac bends down in front of her, Emma smiles at her

"I have some time off" Jac whispers and Emma nods eagerly "And I wanted to spend some of that time with you if that's ok?"

"Yay!" Emma smiles widely and throws her arms around Jac's neck and Jac picks her up and holds her close, she had missed Emma so much and maybe now she could transform her love for Kian into loving her daughter even more than she did currently because that love could cure her, she was sure of it...

-CS-

Jac got a taxi to the hospital, Emma was holding her hand as she walked through the wards in a bid to find Hanssen, Sacha frowned at Emma's presence and he offered to take her for Jac and Emma was more than happy to oblige. They went up to Hanssen's office and she demanded for holiday, she apologised for yesterday's no show and explained everything the best she could, Henrik understood and he granted her some holiday on the promise that she returned someday, she sighed and nodded and that was it she was signed off. She was walking to go and collect Emma who was no doubt sucking up to her uncle Sacha. Of course, her feet took her to Darwin, she just needed to check on everything and she was greeted by an eager Nicky who then alerted Fletch to Jac's presence and he narrowed his eyes.

"You look rough" Fletch observes and Jac rolls her eyes as she flicked her sunglasses up "Wild night last night Naylor?"

"No actually" she snaps and Fletch raises his eyebrows "Right I guess you should all know, I'm taking a break from all this saving lives business to spend time with my daughter"