"I don't think I really like my husband anymore." She stated in a blunt tone as she stared blankly across the room at the therapist she'd been seeing for countless months.
At first she thought it was helping. She thought the talking, and the advice was doing some good for not only herself, but also for their family. And then, after awhile, it just felt the same.
She felt like she was on a treadmill, or a rat wheel. It felt like she was just running and running, yet never actually getting anywhere.
Scoffing lightly, Lindsey tried not to roll his eyes. "Yeah, cause you're a real dream." His words were dripping with sarcasm.
He didn't want to go, not in the slightest. But after she'd begged him for hours, he finally gave in to one meeting... Just sixty minutes and then he wouldn't have to ever go again if it didn't help them.
"Well, Stevie, do you still love Lindsey?" The doctor asked, brow creased with a hint of sympathy.
Sighing softly, she bit down on her lower lip. "I think so..." she lingered, not making eye contact with either of them. "I mean, I love that he..." she paused, trying hard to think of what exactly she loved about him to begin with. "I love that he locks the doors at night before bed."
Lindsey's mouth fell open as his eyes burned into her immediately. "Because I lock the doors?" He half smirked, almost stunned but also not in a way. "Nice." He nodded as a shitty chuckle escaped him.
"That's a good reason, Stevie." Doctor Bonnet assured. "Locking the doors each night is very important. It keeps everyone safe, which is what your husband's doing... Keeping you safe." Her voice was gentle as she tried to encourage more from both sides of the party. "Therefore, it sounds like you love him because he protects you." She added, eyes melting into Stevie's a moment later.
It was obvious just how uncomfortable the couple had become in just mere minutes. But it was hard for them- it was hard talking about loving one another when they didn't even sleep in the same bed at night anymore... They hardly ever spoke at home, let alone shared their love for each other.
She just nodded her head, not exactly sure what to say to that. She didn't see it the same way. "I guess so." She shrugged, almost certain she was the very last person in that house that he was trying to protect.
"This is why we don't get anywhere in conversation anymore." Lindsey held out his hand, motioning towards his wife. "She can't make up her mind for shit." He added, finding it almost impossible not to roll his eyes.
Nodding lightly, the therapist turned her attention to Lindsey. "Would you like to elaborate?" She could tell things had been rocky at home for quite awhile, simply because each week that Stevie was in her office, it was something new that had to do with her husband and even their children.
"For starters, a couple of years ago, she didn't want me to work with her anymore... She said it was too much togetherness." He repeated the same words Stevie had used many years earlier when they were discussing who would leave the band. "So I quit, let her do her own thing for awhile." He added. "But after a couple of months, she didn't want that either, she wanted me back at work with them."
"That's a little fabricated, Lindsey." Stevie shook her head in disagreement, not at all impressed with his choice of wording. "I was totally fine without you in the band, it was everyone else that insisted you return." She shrugged, never once looking over at him when she spoke. "I actually enjoyed the time apart." Her jaw settled with an eyebrow arched so high, Lindsey worried it'd get lost in those bangs.
Sinking back into the leather couch a little further, he just sort of stared at her for a long moment. "Okay, we'll go with that then." He was over it by then- he was just ready to get the hell out of there.
It was easier to pretend like their lives weren't crashing down around them... Like their marriage wasn't slipping through the cracks of their fingers like sand in the wind.
"I'm going to sit outside until you're finished." Pushing himself up, Lindsey readjusted his t-shirt before he trailed towards the door.
"Lindsey, this is-" the doctor was getting ready to encourage him to stay and work through their conversation, but the sound of him slamming the heavy wood cut her off abruptly.
With a gentle nod, Stevie's vision blurred from tears. "We just don't make each other happy anymore."
~~~
Sitting on the sofa, glass of scotch in hand, Lindsey listened to the soundtrack for the fifth time that evening.
After Stevie's appointment, he dropped her back off at their home, leaving her with their kids as he headed for the studio to be alone. He liked it better that way- it was easier and less hectic.
"I really like that one." Her soft voice filled the room only seconds after the track had cut off and silence filled the empty studio.
Cracking a smile, Lindsey turned around in his chair, eyes melting into her blue orbs from across the room. "Sound pretty good?" He wondered, biting down on the inside of his cheek as he watched her venture through the room.
Nodding lightly, the blonde took a seat on the couch not too far from him. "I figured you'd be here, hiding out after your meeting." She couldn't help but giggle, still shocked that he had even agreed to go in the first place.
With a deep sigh, Lindsey shrugged his shoulders lightly. "Sometimes it's better to just go with it." He wasn't afraid to admit that- he had a million times before.
With a soft smirk, she crossed one leg over the other. "Well, I've missed you..." she lingered, chewing her bottom lip. "Handsome man." Kicking one foot out, she let the tip of her heel sneak up his calf.
~~~
"Clancy, I thought I asked you to pick this up?" Her hand met her hip as she stood in the doorway of her daughters bedroom, staring at the mess scattered across the carpet.
"I need help, mommy." The five year old wrinkled a brow, eyes also glued on the million tiny puzzle pieces she had dumped out a couple of hours earlier.
Shaking her head, she waved a hand in the air. "Recruit a sibling, honey." Stevie couldn't look at the mess- it made her feel anxious and overwhelmed.
"You're insane." Lola scoffed, pushing by her mother to get through. "Come on, Clancy... We don't need her help."
