After You 3

15 2 0

ni shanays23

ni shanays23

Z A N N A H

Sa likod ng salamin ng restaurant, malayo sa pwesto ko ngayon, makikita ko ang saya sa mukha mo. It is actually a good view because seeing you happy with my bare eyes, I'm contented. But knowing that I'm not the reason behind those happiness, it kills me.

Especially, now that I'm looking at you. . . with that girl from a far.

I took a deep breath and tried to calm my shaking hands. Nilunok ko ang bumabarang kung ano sa lalamunan.

Your hand are now on someone's waist, na noon ay akin lang.

Masakit, oo. Lalo na't nakikita ko ang patuloy mong paghalik ng mabini sa labi niya.

I feel my tears started falling. . . again.

Sinubukan ko itong punasan pero hindi ko kaya. Bacause right now, my hands are now unbearably shaking.

From so much pain.

You smiled to the woman.

A smiled that is now hard for you to give me.

I breath deeply. Paulit-ulit.

Nagbabakasakaling maibsan ang sakít na ngayon ko pa lang naramdaman. Pero, wala pa rin. Walang epekto.

Dahil mas lalo pa itong sumidhi.

Because right now, I'm watching you kissing her torridly. . . deeply, away from the things I think you could. . . that we did.

Nakahawak ang isang kamay mo sa kaniyang bewang habang ang isa ay nasa batok niya, dinidiin pa ang labi sa isa't-isa.

Patuloy ang pagtulo ng mga luha ko. Nakatakip pa ang kamay ko sa bibig pero hindi ko pa rin maiwasang umalpas ang mahinang hikbi.

Nasasaktan ako. Sobra.

Mas lalo pang lumakas ang paghikbi ko nang makita kong kinandong mo siya sa mga hita mo. We barely do that because you said, you respect me and I do believe in that. But right now, seeing you doing that to other woman, I wished that we did that thing. Para alam ko iyong pakiramdam. Para hindi ako naiinggit at nasasaktan. . . ng sobra.

The people who are watching are now cheering the both of you. Tinutuksong ipagpatuloy niyo.

All of them are laughing, enjoying.

In my bare eyes, I can see that you're enjoying what I am seeing right now.

Still my heart aching, I bitterly smile.

Finally, now you got the chance to do the things you wanted to do with me.

You know now the feeling of kissing in a different way. Torrid and deep.

But the different thing is. . . in someone and not in me.

★ S H A N A Y S 2 3 ★