SYMBOLS

CHAPTER 17

"Kylani was only with us for a few short days. But I, for one, feel privileged to have had the opportunity to know her. Her conviction never faulted, and in the end, she made the ultimate sacrifice. Courage can be honored in many ways. Now is our time to remember."

Janeway's words invoked respectful silence from the little gathering.

Harry Kim stared down at the PADD in his hand. He wanted so much to speak, to contribute to the eulogy. He wanted to let everyone know there was much more to Kylani than just her heroic death. But the lump in his throat prevented him from doing so.

***

Tayna listened to the captain's closing words. The memorial service was finished. She pressed her face and hands against the window and watched the pod float gently away. Lani was gone. She felt numb inside. Then suddenly her mind filled with vivid pictures of her friend and protector, and every muscle and nerve in her body screamed with the effort of holding back the tears.

Tayna knew Harry was sad too. She'd seen a tear drift down his cheek as the pod was ejected.

When Lani died, her body had poured blood. It had coated everything in red, including Harry's hands. Now it seemed like every time Tayna closed her eyes, she relived the last few moments of Lani's life. How easily she recalled Lani's gray face and Harry's blood smeared hands.

Tayna felt alone and completely at a loss among the all-adult crowd of mourners. Uncertain of whom she should turn to, she located the captain.

"Can I stay with you?" she whispered.

"Of course," Janeway replied and patted the child on the head.

Tayna linked her fingers securely in the captain's. She bowed her head and stared at the floor. Tears stung behind her eyes and rolled down her pale, lightly freckled cheeks. Her knuckles grew white and her hands sweaty from their tight hold, but even when her fingers started to become numb, she still clung on tight.

After some time, the captain tried to pass her hand over to another crewman, but Tayna refused to let go.

"You'll have more fun with someone else," Janeway said.

Tayna shook her head.

"Okay, if that's what you want," Janeway relented. "Let me know if you change your mind."

So Tayna spent the remainder of the morning following the captain around, passive, contemplative and basically quiet.

Eventually Janeway settled at her desk. She seemed very busy. Tayna sat on the floor and watched her work. The floor was not the most comfortable place to sit, but it provided her with a clear view of the captain and ensured she was close enough to follow her, should her newly chosen protector decide to walk away.

Her head felt heavy from so many exhaustive tears, but Tayna fought against sleep. She was frightened she might wake up alone, or even worse, in the dark. Her eyes were struggling to stay open, her head fell forward ever so slightly, while her body steadily followed suit and curled itself into a protective ball on the floor. For just a few weary seconds, she gave in to her sleepy eyelids and easily drifted into a deep state of dreaming.

The dream was familiar and Tayna instantly recognized her surroundings. She was home. She was standing in the middle of a field of tall green grass. There didn't seem to be anyone else around and she watched the long grass bend and sway in the breeze. Then she lay on her stomach and clutched a handful of the long green strands, levering them out of the ground and exposing their roots. She was thinking about Lani, when the grass parted and the young woman peered at her through the long green blades. Jubilantly, Tayna hugged her friend. Then together they lazily stretched out on their backs, with their heads touching, and stared up at the cloudless sky.