N.R. One Shots

Sunshine

You sit with your head bowed down, foot tapping. She lays in your arms, the love of your life, and you cradle her frail body to you as close as you can.

A single tear drips down your face. She shouldn't have been the one shot. She shouldn't.

The heart monitor beeps solemnly in the background, counting down the last few moment you and Nat would ever have together.

She opens her tired eyes and turns her head to you. You glance at her through your lashes, trying not to make eye contact. You can't bear to see her like this.

"Hey..its gonna be okay.." Nat coughs a little, taking a breath to compose herself. "You're gonna be okay.."

You simply shake your head, looking away as another tear escapes your brimming eyes, dropping on her hospital gown. Nat slowly takes your face in her hand, caressing your wet cheeks.

"Don't worry.. Its gonna be-"
"Don't say okay. Its not going to be..okay."

Nat shrinks back a little, looking away.
"Sorry I.." You sigh and lean forward, burying your head in the crook of her neck. Its the one place you always felt safe. Always.
"I didn't mean to snap."

"Its okay baby.."

Another few minutes pass in silence, and you continue sobbing into her shoulder. You shouldn't be crying. You need to be strong, for her. Need to look at her without bursting into tears.

Slowly you lift your head from your safe haven, working your fingers through her gorgeous hair. Nat sighs with content as you stroke her hair.

"I'm scared."

You look at her with surprise. She sees your expression, breathing a soft laugh.
"They expect me to be brave..you know? But I'm scared.. Scared of dying. Scared of leaving. Them, you. Scared of being.." She gazes at you, licking her lips. "Scared of being forgotten."

"Nat, baby, no one will ever forget you. I, will never forget you, i-" the words catch in your throat, as another bout of tears takes over and you splutter nonsense.

Nat frowns slightly, closing her eyes. "You promise?"

You stare at the broken, pale assassin and for the first time, you're at loss of words. How would you convince her....

"You are my sunshine..."

Nat opens her eyes slightly, a small smile tugging at her lips.

"My only sunshine.."

"You make me happy, when skies are gray.."

You gaze at her, memorizing each and every aspect of her. Her beautiful ocean green eyes with speckles of hazel around the core.

Her soft red hair that she loves having you braid and brush.

Her full red lips, that had swallowed and given you so many tender kisses.

Her cheeks. Her dainty little nose. Her hands which were always warm. The way she slipped those hands into yours on a cold dark night, holding on tight.

"You'll never know dear, how much I love you.."

The way she draped herself over you, demanding to be held. The way she's shy but also bold. The way she goes red when you kiss her in public.

The way she gets flustered and concerned if you even stub a toe.

You kiss her cheeks as you remember the many nights she woke up with you, to console you after a nightmare. Or scarmbled out if bed to make you hot cocoa.

You press your foreheads together as you remember every passing kiss, every insignificant little hug, every time your hand so much as brushed against hers.

"Please don't take, my sunshine away."

"I'm sorry my love," Nat whispers softly, kissing you slow and soft. You taste her tears as she pulls away, eyes ablaze.

"I'm sorry I have to leave you."

"Its not your fault, Tasha.."

Seconds tick by as you smile at each other. You climb into her bed beside her and she rests her head on your chest.
You close your eyes, comforted by her warm weight on you. She sings softly, and you memorize the sound of her voice, tender and gentle, enveloping you in a warmth only she can give you.

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
You make me happy when skies are gray
You'll never know dear, how much I love you
Please don't take my sunshine away.."

Please don't take...my sunshine.....away...