Breaking The Ice

17

Sa loob ng ilang taon kong umiinom ng alcoholic drink ngayon lang ako nahirapan pumili ng bibilhin. My mind was all over the place kaya hindi ako makapili. Tinitigan ko lang ang hanay ng mga alak sa harapan ko. Mukha na tuloy akong lasing sa lagay kong 'to.

"Hey, nakapili kana ba?" Andrei nudged me. He was carrying chips on both hands.

"Hah?" 

"Bev, okay ka lang ba? Did something happen at dinner?" he asked concerned. 

Tumingin ako sa kanya pero hindi ako makapagsalita. I was really caught off guard with our last phone call. 

"Bev?" tawag nya muli sa akin at ngumiti siya. 

"Ako na lang ang pipili. Pumunta kana don sa may exit. Intayin mo ako matapos magbayad" he said and grabbed two bottles of liquor. 

I lightly tapped my cheek while walking towards the exit. Get a grip Beverly. Si Andrei lang yon okay? 

I heaved a sigh. Mahal ko na ba talaga agad si Andrei Fabella? Do I? 

Sa kalagitnaan ng pag-iisip ko ay di ko na namalayang nakatayo na pala sa tabi ko si Andrei.

"Tara na Beverly" yaya niya atsaka hinawakan ang kamay ko. Yung kabila naman niyang kamay ay hawak ang mga pinamili niya.

We walked quietly papunta sa apartment niya. Quiet but I can still hear my heart beating loudly to the point that I get anxious because Andrei might hear it. Tuluyan na ngang nabasag ni Andrei ang yelong bumabalot sa puso ko. It was so easy for him. He makes everything sound so easy. It's kind of scary actually. Who am I without that ice wall surrounding my heart? I feel vulnerable.

Natigil lamang ako sa pag-iisip when Andrei squeezed my hand. I looked at him with wide eyes.

"Andito na tayo" he said and tilted his head towards the door indicating na pumasok na kami. 

As soon as we entered his apartment, I immediately observed it. Nagulat ako dahil medyo may kalakihan ito. Akala ko ay studio apartment siya pero hindi pala. May sariling kwarto for the bedroom. Ang bedroom at kitchen/dining area ay pinaggigitnaan ng living room. Nababalot ng neutral tones ang space. Malinis ito or naglinis 'tong si Andrei bago ako makarating dito?

There were two sofa's. One is I think a three to four seater sofa while a one-seater sofa is in front of it. May coffee table pa sa gitna. Napansin kong may end table sa tabi ng three seater sofa. May nakapatong na family picture doon. Nilapitan ko ito at tiningnan. Buhat-buhat nung tatay ang batang lalaki na nakabaseball jersey habang nakaangkla sa braso niya ang nanay ng bata. All of them were wearing smiles that made all their eyes small. Yung usual na eye smile ni Andrei.

Napatitig ako sa mukha ng nanay ni Andrei. She was familiar or baka kamukha lang ng mga nakakasalamuha ko noon? 

"Si mama at papa yan" Andrei blurted and I noticed that he was standing behind me. He was also looking at the picture. 

"You played baseball?" I asked.

"Noong elementary ako." he chuckled. "Halika upo tayo dito" 

I carefully placed the picture frame back on the end table and sat beside Andrei. Binuksan nya ang TV na nasa left side ng coffee table.

"What do you want to watch?" he asked. 

"Ikaw bahala" simpleng sagot ko. Napansin kong bukas na pala ang alak na nakapatong sa coffee table kaya nag-umpisa na akong magtagay. 

I was about to drink when Andrei suddenly wrapped his arm around my shoulder.

"What?" I asked with a bit of annoyance.