Dear Heart, You May Speak Now.

Chapter 8

Monday February 9th 2021

Every time I see Chloe and Benson in the hallways holding hands or giving a kiss to each other before class, it makes me feel nauseated.

But what makes me feel even more nauseated then that is my lack of courage. It should have been me that kissed Chloe at the party on Saturday. Who cares if she would have rejected me? At least I would have gotten a clear answer, and put away my wondering forever.

It's lunch time now, and Leon suddenly takes notice of my expression, when Benson and Chloe walk by, hand in hand and Leon happy smiles. He shoves my arm "OH SHIT, don't fuckin tell me Olly. You're in love with Chloe and you had sex with Olivia!?"

I look at Leon like he's the biggest idiot in the world "Shut up. I don't want it to be a big deal for Olivia, so lower your voice." Leon shakes his head at me "Well it's too late now, she's already with Benson, if you interfere now, it'll create a whole thing in our friend group."

I put my hand in my hair "I know. She seems happy. I'm not gonna mess with that." Leon looks at me his mind full of things to say, but he chooses "I'm sorry man." I shrug my shoulders "Whatever, it's just a crush." Suddenly Cora appears to my right "What's just a crush?"

Leon asks "Where'd you just come from?" Cora rolls her eyes "Vincent was telling me about how there's two girls that are fighting over him." I give a hard look to Leon, conveying that I don't want Cora knowing anything about this, then I laugh "Man that guy is such a character."

Cora and Leon shake their heads amused.

Cora says "So what are you guys doing?" Leon's face has a proud expression on it "I'm hanging out with my girlfriend, in two minutes."

Cora hooks her arm in mine "Okay then Olly, can you take me to McDonalds?" I enjoy the act Cora does, displaying the comfort level Cora has developed with me in the short time since we've met.

I answer "Yeah lets go." Cora and me walk out out of the school, to my car outside. I notice how it's a nice day outside, despite the cold, it's the kind of day that makes you feel like a better person then you really are.

Once we get into the car, Cora asks "Olly have you asked Chloe about the scars on her arms at all?" Shock hits me like a tidal wave, wraps me up, and takes me deep into the sea with all the monsters and spiky plants. It takes me a few seconds to shut my door. I look towards Cora "What do you mean?"

Cora looks genuinely sad "Yeah Chloe took her sweater off at the party for a while, and she was just in a t shirt, when she was dancing with Benson and I saw scars. Well I mean everyone saw them, but they dismissed it as nothing to worry about since they looked old, like at least a year old ."

I look into Cora's eyes, waiting for her to tell me that she's not saying what I think she is.

I want Cora to say something like (Chloe's got scars on her arms, because she had an injury when she was eleven, from falling off her tree in her front yard.) I ask hesitantly "Like scars from self harm?" Cora answers "Yes."

She asks "Did you ask her about it?" I shake my head "No. Did you?" Cora answers "Me, Leon, and Benson talked about it a bit at the party. We thought you should."

I start my car, and start heading to a McDonalds, that's about eight minutes away. I ask "Why me?" Cora smiles "Benson was the one who said it, he said that it seems like you and Chloe get each other, and she'd be least uncomfortable talking to you."

I close my eyes for two seconds, when I open them, I don't say anything for a minute. How funny and sick is it that we think we're so observant. We're so oblivious towards people. We could be sitting by someone that's been raped, unbeknownst to us, and we could be making a twisted joke about that subject.