↳ 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘶𝘴 - B.BARNES • 1 •

Handwritten Truths

Dear Laurite,

You're welcome. Truth is, I couldn't just let you stay out there. It would break me.

I have come to the conclusion that we are blinded by our beliefs of hatred. Maybe hatred is the wrong word, there is another phrase out there that is waiting to be used. Not ready; but waiting.

'Hate' is a strong word. Meaning, 'to feel strong dislike towards', I don't think that describes how I feel towards you.

Maybe writing letters is our thing, our way of communication, our way of expressing.

But, we can talk. We can laugh. We can be friends.

Because we are allowed to be.

Sincerely,
Bucky.

ps. your dress didn't look horrible at all.

pps. it made me fall crazily for you.

-
Bucky handed Lila the letter and went on into the kitchen. He watched her cross her legs and open the letter, like an egg that was about to crack. Her hands were always so delicate, so soft, like she was cradling the world in her hands.

Her face tugged at a smile, her fingers fiddling with her lips and twiddling her hair. He watched as she traced the words 'for you' with her pointer finger, and then folded back up the paper and put it in her pocket. She turned and stuck her tongue out at Bucky, making him flip her off in return.

The paper ties them together, but it's just in their relationships nature that they just have to annoy one another at least 75% of the time.

Lila walked over to the kitchen and sat on a bar stool. Bucky watched her with every move, how her shoulders would rise and fall when she breathed, and her eyes would flutter every time she looked at him.

'Heard from Rogers?' She asked him, resting her chin on her hand.

'Why do you care so much?' He smirked, pouring two glasses of wine.

'I don't. I just wanted to make conversation.' She smiled.

Bucky nodded. 'Only through Fury. They've set up base somewhere in Siberia, estimated to stay there for a good couple of days, maybe a week. Nobody's died yet, though.'

Lila gasped dramatically. 'A week? Oh however am I going to live without my darling Steve for a week? This is going to be torture!'

'You and I both know it's going to be heaven.' He smiled, giving her the wine glass.

'Let's just say I'm not sleeping in Steve's room.' She winked, spinning around on her chair and jumping off. She shuffled her feet over to the lounge, sitting down on the couch and grabbing the remote. She felt the cushions sink next to her, as Bucky's weight sank into the comfort of a padded chair.

'Ew.' She snarled, moving the tiniest bit closer to him.

'I feel the same way.' He spoke, also movie an inch closer.

As the movie went on and builded up, so did the sarcastic yet flirty comments. They didn't admit once that they were flirting with one another, they both knew but didn't want to admit to themselves that they caved in.

But what they caved in to was unspeakable.

Bucky watched her with great enjoyment as she smiled at every ludicrous comment, when her forehead creased in confined puzzlement, and when a tear fell down her cheek, but she always concealed it with a smile.

She was so interesting, and Bucky constantly kicked himself for not getting to know her sooner, because if he had just spoken to her, started a conversation with her on this day two months ago, who knows where they would be now.

He was so fascinating, and Lila constantly put herself down for choosing the hard route, the sinister relationship, because who knows what they would be doing right now if she chose the correct path, the right direction.

The credits rolled, and so did the tears. Lila could of sworn she saw Bucky wiping his eye dry, although he didn't want to admit it. She looked at him and laughed, dabbing her eyes with her sleeve.

'There was room for two, I don't get it?' He questioned, pointing towards the television.

'They needed to make a plot somehow. And obviously people joined it because it's like, the third highest grossing movie in the world, so. Plus, it's a romance. Someone always dies at the end.'

He tilted his head and looked at her, that phrase making him sting in the chest.

'What?' She asked, tiding up the cushions.

'Nothing.' He laughed, throwing a pillow at her.

'Fuck off!' She yelled, throwing it back. As she bent down to pick up another cushion off of the floor, her foot gave way, making her fall forwards. She braced for the impact, but the impact never came.

'I guess you really did fall for me.' Bucky whispered, holding her by the waist. Her eyelashes fluttered, and her breathing became uneven.

'Corny.' She giggled, matching the quiet talk. 'You're the Troy to my Gabriella.'

He brought her back up to her normal stance, holding on to her curves for a second longer whilst they shared a languishing look. He released his hands, and she walked away holding the two wine glasses.

The moment was such a small yet big step for the two.

Without breaking the eye contact, she walked over to his room door, standing there for a couple of seconds. He nodded, giving her the answer that she needed. Her heart was racing faster than the speed of light.

-

It had been at least 20 minutes, and Bucky was sure that Lila would be asleep by now. He was scared of waking her, so every move he made was reticent and reserved, folding back the duvet with such gentleness that you would think he was handling a pane of glass. Lila had not placed a pillow in the middle that night, he didn't know if it was that she forgot or if she believed that the barrier was no longer needed.

His head hit the pillow, but before he could drift off, Lila slowly turned around to face him. They just were looking at each other, eyes relaxed, moonlight beaming off of their skin. She lifted her hand and caressed the scarring on his shoulder, connecting his metal arm to his skin. She was considerate; her fingers were smooth and soft and she glided across the rough patches of terror.

Everything was a juxtaposition.

She opened her lips ever so slightly to speak. 'It isn't your fault you know.'
He opened his mouth as it were if he were about to argue back but she stopped him, putting her finger on his lips.

'Shh,' she whispered, 'Let me talk.'

He closed his eyes in content, as she traced the outline of his lips.

'The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward. It's okay to move on.' She spoke, in a caring whisper. She gradually moved her hand away and turned back over again.

'Thank you, Lila.'

That was the first time she had ever heard Bucky Barnes speak her name.

'You're welcome, Bucky.'

Bucky smiled at her saying his name, it made him feel gratified.

It's like her heart had just grown two sizes bigger.

Maybe they've needed to use the opposite word to hate this whole time.
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authors note:
this is making my heart go all fuzzy, I love it