Russell's Cousin- Lando Norris story

Reflection

Sochi.

That was enough to be said in conversation the following week at the MTC. Heartbreak wasn't the word. Lando hadn't spoken to many people. Even Daniel was heartbroken for him.

"Baby?" You asked as you sat in landos office
"Mm" he mumbled
"Are you coming down for lunch"
"No"
"Hey, come on you need to eat. You haven't all day so far" you complained as you stood round the back of his chair
"I'm not hungry" he said still staring into thin air
"Do you want me to bring something up for you?" You asked before there was a knock at the door.
"No" he mumbled before taking a deep breath to face whatever they wanted now

"Come in" lando called
"Good afternoon, Zak wants to see you. He says it something for TV you've been asked to do" Charlotte said
"I'll be down in five." He said with a small smile as she left you both again
"Never mind about food, I won't have time" he huffed as he stood to make his way downstairs.

You let him go and gave him some space and then watched from the large glass balcony window him going down the lift and across to reception to find out where Zak would be. He was rubbing his eyes, he looked awful. He was drained.

—
"How was it?" You asked as lando made his way back upstairs
"They want me on this morning" he smiled
"That's amazing! Congratulations!" You said kissing him
"It's next Monday so we have time. Zak also said we can leave if we want, there is nothing that needs doing and you need a rest" lando said grabbing his laptop and bag
"No you need a rest, the emotions of the past few days has gotten to you"
"I know darling, but it's work. It goes on"
"No it doesn't, you can have moments and you can have a day off. Come on, I'll drive" you smiled holding up his keys
"Hail Mary full of grace..." lando started muttering as you picked up the keys
"Oi! I'm a good driver" you laughed as
"I'm joking"

The drive home was easy enough mid day, you stopped to pick up a few bits of food for the evening while lando was on a call with Jon in the car. Getting back home was the realisation that it was a bomb site. Max had some of the quadrant team over for the weekend after landos pole which turned out very sad and the house was upside down.

"I didn't realise how messy it was" you huffed
"It's ok we will do it together it won't take long" lando said as he hugged you in by your waist
"We aren't spending all night doing it, I'd like a rest" you said as you slummed your bag onto the cubbyhole door.

—
Putting everything back where it belonged didn't take long but you could see lando losing motivation over it. "Do you want to go up to bed, I'll only be ten minutes?" You offered
"No no, I said we would do it together" he yawned as the clock was now at 8:53pm
"Ok, it's ok lando if you want to go up?" You offered again
"I'm sorry I can't do this.." he said walking off in a huff and you could see the tears forming in his eyes as he went upstairs

Everyone thinks life is rosey and perfect for him when it's not, yes he has a very very unlucky weekend but it's not just that, it's the media backlash that 'he isn't a team player' and that he's 'selfish'. He didn't need this pressure on top of everything else.

Once you finished downstairs you made your way to your bedroom and slid in next to lando. "Hey darling" you whispered and you didn't get a response. "I can't imagine how you feel but please don't bottle it up. It's important you talk to me or someone lando, you may need help dealing-"
"I don't need any fucking help" he hissed
"Wow ok! What was the need for that!"
"I don't need any fucking help! Do I need to say it again?!"
"Speaking like that to me? I think you seriously need some help, what's gotten into you? You can't let it eat you lan"
"Don't Lan me Anna. Give me some space and fuck off for the night" he said turning more into the pillow and pulling up the covers. You shook your head in shock at how he was acting
"What the hell! You think you can just order me around?" You questioned
"Yes. Yes I do. Your my PT, my assistant. I made you employable"
"I've had it. Forget it then" you said picking up your phone, charger and glass of water.

You stormed out the master bedroom, slamming the door behind you and ran up to the loft room where you were first staying when you moved in. The fairy lights were still up, the sheets not slept in, landos helmets facing you on the shelf.

Emotions poured out of you as you slumped down the door sitting on the carpet being careful to not spill your drink. Tears rolled down your face as you hysterically cried over the thought of lando pushing you away like that over you trying to help him. Why couldn't he just accept that it's ok to feel how he feels and there are ways to deal with it.

That's when you thought you would be the problem, you were causing the stress to him by mithering him. Uncontrollably you started shaking as your breathing became hitched as you tried to stand and make your way to the bathroom attached.

With now your makeup streamed down your face you tried to brush your hair away from sticking while you washed with cold water. It wasn't going away. The pain wasn't going away. You knew it was a long shot but since your holiday lando hadn't been the same. That was the first major argument you had together and it broke you. It really did.

That's when it started. The shortness of breath, the increased shaking and the fear running through your mind that you caused him to be like this. You tried to call for lando to come and calm you down as you felt the start of a panic attack. "Lan!" You weakly shouted, "la-lando. Lando please don't" you stuttered trying to get your voice together.

It was just there, sat on top of the sink, you took it and made a gash at the top of your leg trying to release the pain. It wouldn't stop so you made another under, slightly bigger and deeper. It was like someone turned a switch on as you realised what you had done. The blood ran down your leg as you stared at it wishing you hadn't just done what you did.
"Lando!" You screamed as you were able to talk again "lando!" You cried out again as you felt the room spin as you stumbled back to the door. You managed to open it before it all went black.

—
"Anna! Anna wake up! Come on!" You heard through a white noise. "Anna come on!" You heard. It was lando. He was there.

"She's awake she's opening her eyes" you heard him shout down the phone. "Ok a crew will be with you in a few moments just keep pressure on the cut"

"Lando.." you spoke softly
"Anna babe, please, your going to be fine I promise"
"What happened..?"
"Urm looks like you caught yourself on the door or something" he said looking around. He held his face away as you could see the tears falling down his cheek

Things went into a slow motion set as the next thing you knew two people dressed in green rushed into the room with lando leading them. They attached one monitor to your finger while the other was getting bandaging together to stop the bleeding.
"Hi Anna my name is Rachael, I'm a paramedic and this is Steven. We heard you had a little accident so we will patch you up and then I'd like for you to come down to the hospital?" She said
"Why do I need the hospital?" You asked dazed still
"We just want to check that you didn't bump your head and run a few tests" she smiled

After a few moments they aided you to stand while lando held your waist keeping you stable.
"Ok Anna we are going to go downstairs where there is a wheelchair you can use for now to take pressure off." Rachael said
"If I could speak to you lando?" Steven said
"He's coming with me right?" You argued
"Yes don't worry we just need to make sure he's ok too" Rachael smiled before walking you to the ambulance.

—
"I just wanted to ask you if you actually know what happened?" Steven asked lando as they walked through to the back of the house
"I don't know - we had an argument and she went upstairs and then I heard her shouting for me"
"Did you see any blades, knifes or anything that could cut her?"
"No"
"You need to tell us the truth, there is no way she fell over. The lines are too precise." Steven commented
"I told you I didn't-" lando started to say before Steven gave him the look
"I found a razor blade but she was so out of it I don't think she realised what she did and didn't want to worry her so I just put it in the bin" he said looking at his feet
"Do you know what she was trying to do?"
"She never struggles with anything! There is never anything wrong with her. She's so positive all the time and caring. She will do anything for you"
"Exactly. She's hiding the pain with her smile. I suggest when you get to the hospital and have some time alone to try and talk through why she did what she did. I'd recommend her to a mental health professional. This argument you said you had.. maybe you need couple therapy"
"Oh fuck off we don't need that!" He laughed
"It's an option. Do you want it to last or not, that's all I have to say"

Steven left and lando stood there alone thinking of what had happened as he looked at the clock in the early morning. He grabbed his phone and pulled some shoes on before locking up and following after you.