What If?

.7.

I was heading back to my room after hanging out with everyone only to find Jess at my door. I sighed knowing this wasn't going to be a nice exchange
"Jess hey" I said happily hoping that would help. Boy was I wrong
"You come in here and act all high and mighty but yet you are destroying everything I've built" She said and I looked at her confused
"all I've built with James, through dance, now it means nothing" She said and I sighed
"look if this is about partners Jess. I'm sorry but I had no say in it at all" I replied
"You know your just his new chew toy" She said earning another confused look from me
"Your this shiny new toy for him to play with, for him to have fun with but sooner or later your shine will rub off and you'll be chucked aside like me" She said and I nodded
"I came here to dance Jess, I didn't come here to ruin your life or steal the boyfriend that isn't your boyfriend" I replied
"We aren't together" She mumbled
"So why should it matter who he hangs out with?" I asked 
"Because you're trying to replace me" She growled
"Let me ask you something Jess, if I was a guy.. Would this matter" I asked and she shook her head
"So why does it matter now" I asked. She began to mutter something underneath her breath before storming off
I was right in what I said though.. If I was a guy and this didn't matter why should it matter because I'm a girl
James and I are partners of course we are going to get close.. It's a given

--

A few weeks have passed and it's all been pretty laid back on the drama side. Classes though they are intense along with National Practice
Our classes had ended for the day and I was in the studio rehearsing. I like to spend as much time as I can perfecting everything. I'm not only going into Nationals in a new team I'll also be going against my home team, it's going to get surreal 
"Wow, I barely recognise you" I hear a voice say, I turn around to see John stood in the door way
"What are you doing here?" I smile as I run towards him falling into his arms
"Not with good news I'm afraid kiddo" He said pulling a face
"what?" I asked
"Mum wants us home for the weekend, I told her we would be there this evening" He sighed. I had Team practice all day tomorrow
"John what do I do?" I asked 
"I wish I knew bug, she sounded serious though" He sighed
"Can you give me an hour?" I asked and he nodded
"I'll be downstairs waiting" He said before hugging me again
This was not where I thought today would be going

I walk over to the 4th years rec room hoping to either find Caiden or Ellie. They are the most approachable out of the team
As soon as I walk in a bunch of them look at me muttering something until my eyes land on Ellie's who was looking my way
I motion for her to come over to which she nods and heads my way
"Hey Nat, you okay?" She asked placing her hand on my back
"No, not really.. Can we talk?" I asked, she looked at me a little worried before nodding and walking into a free room just the two of us

"Shit Natalie, I had no idea that was going on" She said after I filled her in on the fact my parents have no idea
"I'm in a situation now and I don't know what to do" I replied 
"What's going on" she asked placing her hand on mine for comfort
"My mum is demanding me and my brother go home to visit for the weekend. We don't really get a choice" I start to mumble
"but you have team practice.. I get you" She said
"Look don't worry about practice, we are all pretty set on the routine anyway, if there are any changes I'll text you alright?" She asked and I smiled nodding
"I'll cover for you whenever you need. I know how overbearing some parents can be when it comes to their kids" She said hugging me
"Thank you so much Ellie" I replied as we pulled away
"That's okay kiddo, your secret it safe with me" She smiled 

We decided to take a plane this time just for times sake. I haven't seen John this on his seat since we were kids and he broke the front door
"You know I appreciate everything you are doing right John" I replied making him look at me
"I know Bug, I would do it again in a heart beat.. I think I'm just overthinking" He said and I nodded
"I'm over thinking too, why else would they demand we come home for the weekend" I replied
"I have no idea, either they caught wind of the real reason you are here or something is going on" He said and I nodded. Mum and dad have always said to come visit when we can but this time was different
This time they told us we were coming for the weekend 
"So how is the school anyway?" John asked sitting back in his seat probably trying to take his mind off of the fact we could be walking into the death penalty
"It's amazing John, I've never been so happy. I've learnt so much, achieved so much and I've only been there for 1 and a half" I chimed making him smile
"You are an incredible dancer Nat, everyone should get the chance to see you do that" He smiled
"If only dad felt that way" I sighed. Dad has never once shown up to a competition, a practice, a performance. I was constantly fighting for his attention growing up but I wasn't following his plan so he didn't want to hear it
That's how it always goes
"Have you heard from Meg recently?" I asked and he shrugged
"We've had the occasional text but she is all busy. I don't like what is happening to this family" he said and I sighed
"We are divided" I replied and he nodded
"That isn't how it should be. You should be able to have the opportunity to do what you want, study what you want, study where you want. You deserve to be happy. Megan made her choice just like I made mine. I don't understand why you don't get the choice" he ranted 
"I know why" I replied earning a look
"Dad told me a long time why" I mumbled
"He didn't want me throwing my life away on something so stupid" I confessed
"How would he know it was stupid. He's never seen it, he's never seen how your face lights up as music starts, how you can silence a room with the point of your toes" John continued, I sighed hugging into his side
"You deserve more then what he is offering Natalie and I promise no matter what, I won't stop fighting for you" He said kissing the top of my head