Confusing // Ethan Dolan

Chapter seven

'Uhm, wh-what are you doing here?" I say wiping away a tear of my face.

I want to look like I didn't cried, but it isn't worth it. I look disgusting.

I never cry in front of people and it's for a reason: I don't want to look weak. Words can hurt me but what Madison did, hurted me even more.

She turned almost everyone against me and did awful things to me the last two weeks, and I know I'm not weak nor afraid of her. I just can't take it anymore, I need to relief my sadness and anger by crying.

"I wanted to ask you if you're okay."

"Oh," Are you kidding me?

"So... Are you?"

"Yes." no

He looked at his feet, realizing how stupid his question was.

Well, not stupid, stupid the fact that he sees me sad, crying, like he's never seen me before and asks me if I'm okay which I'm obviously not.

"Ethan, why did you suddenly started being rude to me?"

"Uh, um I don't kno- I'm not rude to yo-well, I don't know."

I know he's trying to find an excuse to his bad behavior and I can't stop thinking about what happened before.

oh no there we go again, I feel a tear escape my eye. And then, it multiplies.

I'm crying and I know I won't stop. I don't want to stop.

It's a nice feeling, let go all the pain away. Let go all my emotions away, I'm free.

I forgot something, Ethan is standing right in front of me, watching how my emotions change by a second, looking relief and sad.

"Malena?"

I cry.

"Please say something"

I cry harder.

This is all his fault! He told Madison's best friend about our really really stupid kiss.

"Here" he reaches for my hand, and I look at him. his eyes. I give him my hand, and he helps me stand up. "Let me wash your face." I simply nod. Not breaking eye contact with him, not even once.

With his big hands he washes my face being really careful. He's concentrated on my eyes, my lips. And so am I. His kissable lips, his pierced brown eyes, I'm attracted to his voice. I'm attracted to the way he says my name.

He's only a few inches away from me, the only thing keeping our lips to meet each other are his hands.

Why is he so....beautiful? I wish I could kiss him. I wish he could kiss me. I wish things weren't so confusing.

One day he's the most flirting person I know, the other he's the rudest person I know.

What's wrong with him? As I'm having these thoughts, he's getting closer to me. Even closer than before. He's leaning in. Am I supposed to kiss him?

of course I am.

I feel his lips touch mine, they're so soft.