Twist Of Fate ( Available On Kindle)

part 17

"Rishi," Anu tried for the last time to capture his attention, and fortunately, it worked. Rishi became aware that he was holding her tightly in his embrace. It had been a few minutes since he had been releasing his pent-up emotions through tears, and Anu didn't interrupt him. She allowed him to cry freely until his tears subsided. Unsure of how to comfort him, she simply wrapped her arms around him and gently patted his back until he calmed down. However, his crying only intensified with each passing minute. Anu couldn't tell if it was because of his intoxication or if he was deeply wounded beyond repair. Despite feeling uncomfortable and struggling to breathe due to his tight grip, Anu chose to let him express himself for a while longer before signalling that he was crushing her by tapping his shoulder.

Releasing his hold on her, Rishi turned away, taking a moment to compose himself after letting his emotions flow freely. Anu felt relieved that his tears had finally stopped, as witnessing his distress pained her deeply. She still didn't know the reason behind his breakdown, but she couldn't bear to see him in such a vulnerable state. Anu had always seen Rishi as a cheerful person, but tonight she realised that he was adept at hiding his sorrow behind a facade of happiness. She had sensed something amiss during their engagement when he avoided making eye contact, but she didn't press him further, assuming he would open up when ready. Now, Anu regretted not probing deeper into his troubles, wishing she had offered him the support he needed.

Realising that it wasn't too late to help him now, Anu fetched a water bottle and offered it to Rishi. Though hesitant at first, he eventually accepted and took a few slow sips. Anu couldn't help but admire the way his Adam's apple bobbed as he drank, though she felt embarrassed for being distracted by such trivialities in such a serious moment. Refocusing her attention on comforting him, Anu gently cleared her throat to capture his gaze.

"Rishi, it's time to talk. What's bothering you? And what about your message?" she inquired softly.

Rishi seemed to search for the right words before responding hesitantly, "I, uh...umm..."

"I won't say it's okay if you don't want to share right now. I deserve the truth before we get married," Anu interrupted gently. "I need to know if you're marrying me for who I am or if I'm just a distraction for you."

"I am sure about you, I like you a lot...... but at the same time it seems like I haven't moved on yet," Rishi said, cutting Anu off.

"And what am I supposed to do with that now?" Anu asked him with a straight face.

"Look, I'm sorry, but think from my shoes. I'm a mess," Rishi replied.

"And what do you think I'm feeling right now?" Anu felt things were spiralling out of control. She didn't want to reveal her feelings of neglect to him, fearing it might confuse him further. But her desperation to know his decision was overwhelming. Would he call off the marriage?

The thought made her breaths heavy, considering the possibility of losing him. Could she handle that? Even for self-concern, she couldn't say 'yes'. She couldn't bear the thought of him missing her. But why was she behaving like someone who had nobody to love her but her boyfriend? She had loving parents and supportive friends. Yet, she realised Rishi had become incredibly important to her in just six months of their engagement.

She questioned why she had fallen so deeply in love with him. Was she too love-deprived to let go of someone she had met just a few months ago? Wasn't the love from her friends and family enough? She searched for reasons but couldn't find any. She just yearned for him, his essence, his smile, everything about him.

But then came the life-shaking question: Did he feel the same for her? If not, what would she do in a loveless relationship? One-sided love was bearable until it led to marrying someone who didn't reciprocate the same feelings.

"I'm sorry," she heard Rishi's low murmurings.

"Say something other than sorry," Anu snapped, not out of anger but out of disappointment in her own helplessness.

"I don't know what to say, I'm blank," Rishi admitted, his guilt and sorrow evident on his face.

"Just tell me if you want to give us a try? Or not?" Anu asked him directly.

"We can talk about the other things later. First, I want to know if you're ready to welcome new changes in your life or if you just want to cling to the past," Rishi replied, surprising Anu.

She had intended to pressure him more and make him reveal the secrets he was hiding, but her softer side couldn't bear to see him suffer. She realised he was already going through a mental breakdown, and pushing him further might only make things worse.

Despite her own painful feelings, she couldn't stand to see him in pain, and that was the moment she realised that what she feels for him isnt just affection or liking but something more, more like love ?

She couldn't help but feel a twinge of sadness as she realised that Rishi's heart still belonged to Anu, despite all these years since their breakup. Tears welled up in her eyes, blurring her vision as she waited for his response. He seemed lost in thought, his gaze fixed on the floor as he contemplated something.

After a moment of silence, she heard his deep voice break through, "I can, but I need your support too. I know things will get worse, I'll get vulnerable, and you'll have to witness that too. Maybe this process will take much longer than we thought, but I want you by my side, more than just a fiancée. I want you as a friend of mine. Is that okay for you?"

Though she was unsure of what exactly he meant, his determined stare conveyed his readiness to move forward, at least for the time being. She still wrestled with his earlier admission about his lingering feelings for his ex, but decided it would be best to address it when he was sober. After all, she needed time to clear her own thoughts and emotions before making any decisions.

Without saying a word, she simply nodded in response, and they remained silent for a while longer.

"I should go now," he finally said after a lengthy pause, attempting to rise from the bed. She watched as he stumbled slightly but managed to maintain his balance.

Idiot!

It would be risky to let him leave in his current drunken state, but keeping him here seemed equally precarious. What if her parents found him in her bedroom? It would undoubtedly be awkward, but she couldn't think of any other option. She needed him to be safe, no matter the consequences.

"Rishi," she called out softly, ensuring her voice didn't carry too far.

Upon hearing her faint voice, he turned to look at her. "Stay here. I'll wake you up early in the morning, and then you can leave," she told him firmly.

"Umm... no. It's okay, I can manage," he grumbled, scratching the back of his neck.

"See, you're not in your senses. Just do as I say. You can take the couch. Good night," she said in one breath, before making her way to her bed and pulling the duvet over herself. Turning to the other side, she pretended to be asleep.

From the corner of her eyes, she noticed him standing there for a few minutes, appearing confused and hesitant about sleeping in her bedroom. She couldn't understand why he was being strange about it, considering they had already shared a bed back at his apartment.

After a moment, she saw him make his way towards the couch, and she breathed a sigh of relief. Thankfully, he didn't argue and simply went to sleep. A few minutes later, his snoring filled the room, indicating that he had fallen asleep rather quickly. Turning to the other side, she finally allowed herself to look at his sleeping form.

He seemed peaceful while asleep, and despite the multitude of unresolved questions swirling in her mind, she couldn't help but feel a fondness for him. However, her mind was too restless to find peace. Thousands of thoughts raced through her mind, preventing her from falling asleep.

After tossing and turning for about ten minutes, exhaustion finally took over, and her eyes grew heavy. It was as if her soul yearned to escape from reality and find solace in the realm of dreams.