Monster (A Bucky Barnes fanfiction)

Bucky Barnes

I drive the rest of the way to Seattle, letting Kat sleep because of her rough night. I feel so horrible about breaking her ribs, I thought she was someone trying to hurt me.

We get to the hotel we're staying at and I check us in. I wake Kat up and we go to our room. I can tell she's in pain by the way she's walking, so I pick her up gently.

"Hey! Put me down!" she yells and smacks my chest.

"No. You're in pain and you barely weigh anything. I'll carry you," I answer and keep walking.

"This hurts though. Pretty much everything hurts. Talking, laughing, yelling, moving, anything."

"Are you trying to guilt trip me?"

She shakes her head then cries out in pain. "I thought you said you've felt worse pain," I tease.

Kat whacks me in the face a few times but thankfully we get to the room before she can hit me anymore. I set her down and open the door. She pushes by me and flops down on the bed.

My stomach drops at the sight in front of me. There's only one bed. Not a pullout couch or anything.

"This hotel room sucks. Why did you pick here?" Kat whines.

"I thought it was a hotel and I thought there would be two beds or a couch. Not just one bed. I'll sleep on the floor," I offer.

"No, you won't. The floor is germy and dirty and I won't let you. We'll sleep together just promise me you won't flail around and hit me."

"I promise. Are you sure you don't mind?"

"Bucky, I'm positive. Nothing is gonna happen, I'm broken."

"Nothing would happen anyways, I barely know you."

"Yeah, but you have seen me without a shirt on," she jokingly winks.

"And same for you, but you enjoyed it more," I reply and smirk.

"Who knew Bucky Barnes is a joker."

"Apparently the Sergeant Barnes part of me was quite the joker before World War Two."

"Well, it's better than you trying to kill me with your eyes."

"I have never done that," I feign hurt.

"Mhm. When you tried to strangle me to death your eyes were pretty scary," she teases, but I see the bruise on her neck. I haven't stopped hurting her.

"I'm sorry for that and breaking your ribs. I don't know what came over me," I quietly apologize.

"Your training is what came over you. And that's not the first time I've been choked out," she laughs.

"Your job kind of sucks."

"Yeah, it's not too bad most of the time. Pretty boring, actually. Until I got assigned your case, that is."

"Who's director now?"

"I think it's Phil Coulson. Fury's off looking for Hydra somewhere overseas," Kat replies.

She yawns and I laugh. "You just slept in the car all the way here and you're still tired?"

"Well, the weeks leading up to the big battle and the helicarriers, I hardly got any sleep. I was working around the clock to get everything ready," she answers, yawning again.

"I thought the Insight team was Hydra."

"They are. I didn't know that. I was working with Hydra that whole time. Thankfully, Cap stopped them or I'd feel pretty horrible. Or I'd be dead."

"The latter sucks. I'm glad you're not dead."

"Bucky Barnes getting affectionate?"

"No, you just saved my life and helped me blend in a little better. So, I probably would've been brainwashed again if it wasn't for you."

"I don't think so. You could live without me. You could hide and not be found for months. But, if you want to blend in more, grow a big beard. You were always clean-shaven at Hydra, am I right?"

"Yeah, but I don't like having a big beard. I don't even like having stubble."

"Have you ever had a big beard?" Kat questions, a small smile on her face.

"No, but I don't think I'd like the feeling," I respond, grinning back at her.

"Well, I'm going to bed, goodnight. Don't hit me in the ribs or try to strangle me, okay?"

"Okay, don't try to pin me down."

Kat lies down, her back to me. Within seconds, I hear her even breathing. I try to give her as much room as possible because I don't want her to feel uncomfortable. I go to sleep almost falling off the bed.

I wake up the next morning with Kat huddled against me. I stay where I am so she doesn't get woken up. She huddles against me more, her head on my chest. It would be more comfortable for me to wrap my arms around her, but I don't want her to be uncomfortable when she wakes up.

She sleeps for two more hours before she stirs. By the time she wakes up, her body is pressed against mine and I can feel her heartbeat. When Kat's eyes open and she realizes where she is, she jumps up and immediately starts apologizing while clutching her ribs.

"It's okay, don't worry about it. I didn't mind," I put a hand on her arm.

She looks at my hand, "Are you sure? I didn't mean to."

"Kat, it's fine. I'm not mad."

I'm actually kind of happy, I had forgotten what it was like to be close to somebody. It felt nice to know that I wasn't going to hurt her. I already feel so much more comfortable with her and it's only been two days.

"Sit down, I'm going to wrap your ribs again," I tell Kat.

She takes off her shirt and I wrap her up. Kat thanks me and kisses my cheek. I give her a small smile, then go to the bathroom to take a shower.

I start thinking about everything. Hydra, Steve, how we're going to stay hidden. Then, I think about my feeling toward Kat. I definitely felt something when she kissed me, was it happiness or love? I know I don't love her, but it could get there. I'm not going to say anything to her, I don't want to make things awkward. She can't exactly leave me.

I get out of the shower and stare at myself in the mirror. What's going on with me? Why am I falling for a woman I just met two days ago? I'm sure she doesn't feel the same. The kiss was probably just her way of saying thank you. Who would want to be with someone as damaged as me?