A Gentle Disease (Joel Hokka)

(10) Burst Into Flames

Sonja

It had been a week since Joel had kissed me. He was nowhere to be seen, finals were coming up anyway so I was working on lots of papers and examinations. So I maintained my focus. I sighed, honestly I knew that kiss was to good to be true.

My thoughts were consumed, I know that Joel would start to push away and I would be hurt. It seems to be a regular occurring event. I sat in the cafe sipping my matcha latte typing away on my white Dell XPS. My iPhone dinged.

Aleksi: Hey Sonja, I'm in the area. Where are you?

I responded back that I was in a cafe, I had one more page left and decide to type more faster, as I quoted something from my textbook and explained it. Until I felt a tap on my shoulder and I stood up and hugged him.

"Hi Aleksi!" I said hugging him, he chuckled and we sat down.

"So what are you up to?" He asks me.

"Oh you know finals. I just finished two papers." I say with a smile, for my lab class I just had to get a binder and hole punch them and place them in there. With a table of contents, but I would work oh that at home.

I shut down my laptop, Aleksi knew something was bugging me. That kiss bothered me, it made me feel things. But a guy like Joel, something wasn't adding up. I had a feeling he would hurt me.

"Did something happen between you and Joel?" He asks me. How did he know? Aleksi, you're too good at this!

"Wait...How do you know?" I asked him and he just shrugged.

"Just a feeling... Look you can trust me." Aleksi whispers and places a hand on my shoulder, I liked being around Aleksi. I felt safe and happy like for once, it felt like I truly belonged in the world.

"So he uh kissed me." I whispered to him and Aleksi nods.

"And let me guess you're pushing him away?" Aleksi asks and I shook my head no.

"It's not me! It's him actually. I've just been a little busy with life. Work, school and physical therapy." I said to him and he understood.

Aleksi took me to the recording studio. I saw him sitting with a brunette girl on his lap, they were kissing. My heart dropped, of course it was too good to be true with him.  Niko, Joonas, Olli and Tommi were huddled up together. So I decided to follow Aleksi near his computer and I plopped down on his lap.

"You're okay Sonja, remember what Joe says you're an Iron Lady." Aleksi whispers in my ear and I nodded with a smile. I sat on one of his thighs, while his hand was wrapped around my waist and he was showing me what he was doing.

"Can you sing?" Aleksi whispers into my ear and I nodded. He gave me a set of headphones and showed me an instrumental, I knew the song Burst Into Flames by Cavale.

He walked into the recording booth, I saw the five guys get silent. I think they were going to watch me, Joel was still busy.

"Alright Sonja. Can you hear it Aleksi asks me through the recording booth and I raised my thumbs up.

I closed my eyes and bobbed my head. I began singing:

I know how to dive into another body
Know how to rest into a car wreck
I know how to one-two my knuckles bloody
Know how to blow through stacks of dead precedents

And I know it doesn't have to be this way
There's a voice in my head sayin', "Please, please, please"
And I know it doesn't have to be this way
But I'm not listening