Most teachers are nice and helpful, but there are bad, awful, wretched, soulless, freaks of anger who are also allowed to teach. We’re not going to list teachers who commit real crimes, because we all know those teachers are terrible. Instead, here are the legal-yet-awful types of teachers dwelling in a classroom near you.
In order of least to most worst, they are....
100. Math teacher who leans over your desk to watch you calculate during a test. Back up, lurker! Math is hard enough without your coffee-smelling body hovering above.
99. Super happy Life Skills/Home Economics teacher who hands out candy instead of grades. Thanks for preparing us for the real world, Mary Poppins. Because of you, when we asked the scary man living in the car behind 7-11 if he’d like us to sew him a pizza-shaped pillow, he stabbed us in the shins.
98. Teacher who can’t remember names.
97. Teacher who tries to be cool by mentioning Justin Bieber and Hannah Montana.
96. Teacher who can’t handle technology and takes his frustration out on the young generation. Having a smartboard in your classroom can be a useful tool, until this guy tries to write on it with chalk. And when that doesn’t work, he’ll yell at you and explain how, “Cell phone Twitters will rot your brain.”
95. Study hall teacher who has something to prove.
94. Former teacher from the 1950s who retired and is now the world’s angriest substitute. He’s surprisingly strong for a 104-year-old.
93. Driver’s Ed teacher who makes you run errands while teaching you to drive. “OK. Now let’s just drive over to the dry cleaners. I need to run in real quick. While I’m in there, practice the windshield wipers.”
92. English teacher who fails to recognize that books written after 1890 can also be classified as literature.
91. Goofy science teacher who makes the same joke every week. “You know who was good at solving electrical mysteries? Sherlock Ohms!”
90. French teacher who would make you ask to use the restroom, in French, even if you were vomiting.
89. Algebra teacher who thinks algebra matters.
88. Health teacher who doesn’t understand what’s so funny.
87. Teacher who has a mysterious refrigerator in his room. What’s in there! What are you keeping cold!? And why is it locked?!
86. Drama teacher who wears 17 scarves.
85. Teacher with handwriting so awful that it looks like Dwarven Runes.
84. Biology teacher who doesn’t understand what’s so funny.
83. Gym teacher who thinks everyone should be able to run a mile without slowing down.
82. Art teacher who failed as an artist and takes her frustration out on you and your (pretty decent) 3-Point-Perspective drawing.
81. Any teacher who replies with, “I don’t know. Can you go to the bathroom?!”
80. Teacher who sides with the popular kids because he wants to be liked.
79. Teacher who expects you to be just like your older sibling.
YOU ARE READING
99 Ways to get Rid of Annoying People
HumorWelcome and beware this book may change your life :3 CAUTION: Please keep in mind that this book is purely fiction and anything deemed inappropriate in this book is purely for laughs. I am not trying to offend anyone.