I Never Left You

10. Nightmare

Ray's POV
Please don't go, please you can't leave us alone.... We neeeed you. Her hoarse voice keeps calling me. Her voice is so dry and pleading that am almost forced to drop everything and stay. I suddenly wake up from this confusing unending dream. I wipe off the sweat from my half naked body, I dreamed running and on waking up my body is drenched in sweat, it's like I have been on the field running. This dream started ever since I joined the military. Yes that morning after Ra's birthday my dad summoned me and Kevin to his office and informed us that the recruitment process was all set so me and Kevin had to leave  ASAP. I didn't even have a chance to say goodbye to Ra and the way she resents me proves that mum didn't give her the letter I left behind nor did Remy give her a hint on my whereabouts.
Back to the dream, there's always a woman whose face I can't see but she keeps on begging me not to go. She claims I need to stay behind and protect her. She's dressed in a long dress with a hoodie so I can't clearly see her face. She has a bag in one arm and a baby in the other. In my dream am always dressed in the army uniform ready to board the vehicle that will drop us off at our camp but this stranger keeps begging me to stay. "I want to assure her that I will be there and that she will be safe but instead I always ask her who she is, to which she only replies "you know me". Most times I try to go back to sleep so I can continue the dream and at least give her my assurance such that I can leave at peace but in vain. I wish I knew what this dream was all about or who this woman with a child is or how to help her but nothing. I confided in Kevin but he said he also didn't know how to help UT maybe to visit a therapist. On coming from camp, I went to see Dr. Collin, the best therapist in Boston but he equally wasn't helpful. The only thing Dr. Collin was able to conclude was that the dream could be about someone I knew or maybe related too. The only time I  slept soundly was at Ra's place. I don't know how to explain it but I had never slept safe in ages than I did then. It was like she had calmed the darkness that surrounded me most of the night. I texted her a couple of times today but she told me she's still at home. so that's where she was rushing to go yesterday. I have lost sleep after my usual nightmare.
I contemplate on texting pen since she's a late sleeper or probably on some random party hooking up with a random guy. But it's a Sunday night, probably she's asleep too. I decide against Pen knowing that Azra Falls is all I need. Pen is a sweet friend although she wants to make out with me every second she gets. there's no connection between us. I constantly explain to her that am only interested in her as a friend but she said she could be a friend with cream on top. What does that even mean? Girls, girls!!  I can't be thinking of girls all the time. I grab a bottle of water and spot my notes on the table so instead I decide to do some reading.
I plug in my earPod's and listen to some ballards as I concentrate on earth formation. it's funny when you think that the world was just formed by forces, not that am against the theory of creation but it's more meaningful to tell me that when tension forces acted on a piece of land, some of it rose to form a highland than saying God said let there be a mountain. Though I strongly believe in God and God's creation is a wonderful work of art. I mean look at the way the mountain kisses the sky, the way the lakes and oceans welcome water from the rivers. My favourite are the trees and forests. The way they take up the air we breathe, convert it to food or rain is a daily miracle. If I could choose to be something in the environment I would gladly be a tree and serve the world selflessly. Sadly man is constantly destroying the natural environment, cutting the trees that are our only living hope, polluting the water bodies we drink from, melting the snow caps and not forgetting the battle between man and fauna all in the name of development. It's really a shame that we cannot coexist with nature and as Raymond Fisher I will make sure that changes. We need to create an environment that doesn't need protecting. Not to wait till the last tree is cut for us to believe that we cannot survive without money. We need to find a solution to climate change cause we're losing diamond in search of gold. We really don't deserve this planet.