#2: Strumming the Pain

Strumming 06

"How are you feeling?"

I glanced at Kirk when he suddenly asked me that question after a long silence between us. The tone of his voice doesn't sound annoying at all, he sounds worried...or maybe it's just me. I took a deep breath before answering him.

"I think... I feel a little bit better now." looking away, I answered him. It was almost a whisper.

I should feel okay, right? I should stop being so dramatic about... everything. I think... this is nothing compare to what other people is going through.

"Uwi na tayo? Baka pagalitan ka n'yan." sabi naman niya sa 'kin, hindi pa rin nagbabago ang tono ng boses niya.

Tumango na lang ako sa kanya at tumayo na. Hindi naman ako mapapagalitan, e. I don't even know if Dad wants me to come back. I bet he doesn't care even if I go back or not. My brows furrowed when Kirk stopped walking and looked at me, it looks like he was waiting for me.

I sighed. "Kaya kong umuwi mag-isa." sabi ko sa kanya. "Hindi na ako bata para ihatid mo. Hindi rin naman ako maliligaw dahil alam ko ang dadaanan ko."

"Alam ko naman 'yon pero gabi na, baka mapagalitan ka." sagot naman niya sa akin. "Tara na, ihahatid na kita. Huwag kang makulit, ako na lang ang magpapaliwanag sa mga magulang mo." makulit pa na sabi niya.

"Hindi ako papagalitan. Gabi na nga kaya kailangan mo na ring umuwi." sabi ko naman sa kanya.

He was hesitant at first but I insisted. Hinintay ko pa siyang makaalis bago ko napagdesisyonan na umuwi. Akala ko ay umuwi na siya pero natanaw ko pa siyang sumusunod sa akin. He would even hide everytime I look back, akala yata niya ay hindi ko alam na naka-sunod siya sa akin. Kahit din naman magtago siya ay kita ko pa rin siya.

I rolled my eyes, ang kulit niya talaga kahit kailan. Hindi ba niya naiintindihan 'yung sinabi ko? Kaya kong umuwi mag-isa. I'm not some kid that needs to be taken care of. My dad doesn't even care about me.

The next day, maaga akong natapos mag-ayos kaya paalis na rin ako. Akala ko ay wala akong makakasalubong dahil masyado pang maaga pero natanaw ko si Tita Ina sa living room. She's holding a magazine and didn't even bother to glance at me. I know that she can feel my presence but she still chose to ignore me. I think it's for the better, this is better than hearing some words that cut like a damn knife.

I saw Juliana when I stepped out the house. She's talking to someone on the phone and is smiling widely. She didn't notice me because she's busy having conversation to someone over the phone.

"Uh... yes, of course, babe. Mommy will have a business trip tomorrow and will be back the next day. I think... Dad will accompany her." I heard her said. "My sister isn't home most of the time, so I think you can come over. Will you come, babe?" she added.

My brows furrowed because of what I heard. Sa pagkakaalam ko kasi ay hindi siya pwedeng mag-boyfriend. Tita Ina is so protective to her, and also Dad. They will do everything just for her. They will risk everything if it's for her. They won't do the same thing when it comes to me, though.