#2: Strumming the Pain

Strumming 49

Everything is so chaotic. It's been two days since that article came out. I also watched the video the same day I saw the article. Maisie sent it to me, and I have no idea where that came from. I was so frustrated, and I don't know what to do. It's also been two days since Kirk and I last talked. I can't even call him because Maisie took my phone.

Maisie adviced me to not use my phone for the meantime. Ever since that article came out, hindi rin siya umalis sa condo ko. I can't even call Kirk! We haven't talked. I'm so worried that he might not believe me when I tell him that it wasn't me and I have no idea where it came from. I'm so scared that... he might not want to hear my explanations.

"Khaisia, kumain ka muna." sabi sa 'kin ni Maisie kaya nabalik ako sa reyalidad. "When was the last time you ate?"

"I don't have an appetite. Can I just get my phone back?" I asked. "Or at least my iPad? I'm bored as hell."

"Khaisia," she called me as if giving me warning.

"I know... I won't check my social media accounts. Can I just call someone?" paki-usap ko pa.

She sighed heavily before giving back my phone. I thanked her, and immediately went to my room to call Kirk. Mas lalo akong natakot nang hindi siya sumasagot sa mga tawag ko. Malalim akong bumuntong-hininga dahil hindi ko talaga siya ma-contact.

I checked the messages. Isa lang ang message niya, it was yesterday— seven-thirty in the morning. Did he already see the video by this time? Hell, I don't know. My head is aching because of so many questions.

From: Lover

I'll be busy, love. I might not have time to check my phone. I'm sorry. I'll see you soon, okay? I love you.

I also checked the other messages. My friends also messaged me, asking how I feel. I think they already saw the video. Is there a possibility that Kirk already saw it? Naniniwala ba siya na ako 'yung nasa video? I never done anything like that.

I know I told Maisie that I won't check my social media accounts, but I just couldn't help it. Ang dami kong notifications. Pinindot ko ang comments sa last na Instagram post ko. It was flooded with comments saying that they were disgusted by me.

'Kadiri. Kababaeng tao pero ganyan siya.'

'Yuck! I can't believe I shipped her with Kirk.'

'Kirk deserves better!'

'Ganitong klase ba ang gusto niyo para kay Kirk? Ang dumi-dumi.'

'I used to be a fan. I'm so disappointed with you, Khaisia.'

'What a slut.'

'She looks drunk. Gosh! Where's your self-respect?'