Pain Is Power

8: Yelena

"How was the mission?" I asked Amelia who was sneaking into the bedroom. I was grateful she was trying to be quiet as she thought I was sleeping, I guess she wasn't completely heartless towards me. "Fine." She says quietly. I turn the lamp on so she can see. She changed quickly and then hung her dress up. "Wanda and I made up." "Good." "Are you okay?" "What do you want me to say to you Natasha?" She asked turning to look at me. 

I was queit for a moment. "Do you know where Yelena is?" I asked her. "I do." "Can you tell me where she is?" She gave me a once over. "No." She said bluntly. "Why?" "If she wanted you to know where she was she would have contacted you herself. Your face is plastered all over the city." "Please." "No." She says going into the bathroom. 

"Are we ever going to move past this?" I asked leaning against the bathroom door, she was washing her face getting all the make-up off. "I don't know." She answered. "I missed you." "I was just a kid you didn't care about me." "Of course I did." "You cared about the information in mine and Piper's heads you didn't care about us." "I cared about you both." She wouldn't look at me. "I'm sorry I left you." I tell her meaning it with all my heart. "I don't get how you could do it." She says finally looking at me now her face was rid of her make-up. "I could never walk away from Piper, no matter what they made us do, how much they hurt me I could never walk away from her. I stayed with her to the end holding her hand. I didn't walk away when she was dying as he started to hit me, I held her hand just as tight as I always have and I held her so she wasn't alone. Because I love her and she's my sister and that means something to us. With each other till the end. Blood or not Yelena was your sister. And you walked away. I don't get it." 

"What happened to Piper?" "No." I practically saw her shut her emotions off. She disassociates and her face goes blank. "You have to talk about it." "No, I don't. Not with you. Not with anyone." "If you don't it's going to haunt you forever." "Then so be it." 

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"Did you and Amelia fix things?" Steve asked sitting beside me at the dining table. I was eating my breakfast. "We're not fixable." I tell him simply and continue to eat my food. I had porridge this morning with mixed berries. "What happened?" "I told you, I left." "But-"Look I'm not getting into it. Thats all you need to know." 

"I thought things were better." "Why would you think that?" "Well the arguing has stopped." "It's called ignoring each others exsistance." I inform him. Amelia walked into the kitchen didn't even look my way as she grabbed and apple and a water bottle "Morning Steve." before leaving the room. "Exhibit A." I tell him smugly. "She's just acting as if you don't exsit? A little immature." "No she acknowledges me. We're just trying not to annoy everyone with our constant arguing so the daily explosion happens around 11:30 when we're both in the bathroom." I inform him. It's been a week since our last public argument. Since then we've been avoiding each other and when we are in the same proximity we just ignore one another. 

It was no secret everyone was tired of our arguments, or bickering if you will. So were being respectful but I was hard, we find it difficult to be in the same building with one another. I don't mean to upset her and I don't mean to get mad at her but I find myself bubbling up and then it just pours out and she isn't one to sit back and take it. I guess that is what happens when you've been opressed and ordered around for a majority of your life, you get to the point where you just don't take shit from anyone. 

So now our arugments are concealed behind the doors of our bedroom. Every night at the same time she goes and washes her face and I go and brush my teeth, our bathroom isn't the biggest room in the world and we're both using the sink and then we knock into each other or splashes one another and then all of the days emotions come out and we end up in a screaming match for an hour and a half. We get into bed and repeat again the next day. I guess it's working, if Steve thinks things are fixed between the two of us we had to be doing something right.