Pain Is Power

54: Promotion

Amelia walked in holding a water bottle and looking less than perfect. "Are you okay?" She looked me up and down before walking away. Peter came in looking in the same state as Amelia. "What did you two do last night?" I asked trying to sound casual. "we had fun." He said bluntly walking away.

I went upstairs where I knew she'd be, she's hungover. "Amelia, can I come in?" I say knocking. "Access code needed," Friday said. "312." "Access denied." Ouch, that hurt. "Amelia, we need to talk," I say leaning my head against the door. I was getting the silent treatment. I mean I did ignore her for weeks. "Amelia."

"She's not in there," Yelena says as she walked past. "Where is she?" She nudged her head. "Our room?" She nodded. I walked down and she was sitting on my bed. "Can we talk?" She nodded. I closed our door. "You changed your code to your room." She nodded. "When?" "Last night." "Why?" "You don't need the code to my bedroom when I'm not in there." I always go into her room when she's not there, I spent most of my free time in there. With Kate and Yelena using this room to hang out in, it was easier to be in her room and she never cared before. "I'm sorry I exploded last night, it wasn't your fault." "I know it wasn't my fault." She says bluntly.

"Why don't you talk and I'll listen..." I suggested because I was going to make it worse like I always do. "I don't have anything to say." "You don't?" She shakes her head. "You left last night so you didn't say something that you'll regret. So you clearly have something to say." "I'm hungover and my patients for all this is running rather thin so I'm going to listen to what you have to say so we can get this over with." "You're leaving aren't you?" "You made that choice." "No, I didn't." "You told me you wanted me to drop out of the avengers because you're scared. So if I don't you won't be able to deal with that and we'd be done anyway. And I'm not going to quit." "I'm not going to break up with you because you don't want to retire from the team."

"You won't have to. We're going to keep arguing about it. There's going to be insecurities, there's going to be bad days and worse days. We're going to end up hating each other. I'd rather skip all that pain and just start getting over it from now." She had no emotion in her voice no feelings towards me in her eyes. She had thrown in the towel. "No." "No?" "No. You didn't let me break up with you I'm not letting you break up with me."

"I slept with someone last night." She says. "You what?" "I had sex with someone last night. I went out had a few to drink found a willing guy and slept with them. In our bed." And she walked away. "You're lying." "Not lying, ask Peter." "You wouldn't sleep with someone else. Not whilst we're together. You wouldn't let someone see you like that." She was lying to me. She would only sleep with me when it was pitch black because of her scars, she wouldn't shower with me. I had to leave the room when she was changing she hates them so much she just wouldn't do it. "You wouldn't hurt me like that." She wouldn't. That wasn't her she didn't do malicious things to get back at people. She wouldn't.

"I drank too much last night. We can talk later." "Tell me you didn't." "You know I didn't." And she leaves the room.

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A few hours passes and there was a light knock on my door. Mila pushed it open, her hair still wet from a shower and she was wearing one of my hoodies with her gym shorts underneath. "Can I have my necklace back? Peppa said she gave it to you?" I nodded got it off my bedside quickly and held it out. She sat beside me and moved her hair so I could put it on her. My fingers touched her scar it wasn't covered up for once. I ran my fingers along it, I couldn't help myself I know she hates it but it's part of her and I could never hate anything about her she was perfect. She had her back still facing me as I did it, chills ran through her body. I pecked it softly in a few places. "Nat." She whispered. "You're perfect," I whispered back kissing her just behind her ears. "Everything about you is perfect."