Sa Ilalim Ng Buwan

Chapter Thirty-one

Maurice

I tried calling Sarina for about an hour now pero hindi pa rin ako sinasagot. Medyo nag-aalala na rin ako dahil hindi naman ito hindi namamansin. Sinubukan ko ulit na i-ring  hanggang sa magdisisyon na akong puntahan ito. On my way papuntang garage ay nakasalubong ko  ang ama kong may hawak na wine glass. Tinaasan ako nito ng tingin.

  "Saan ang punta mo? Gabi na."

  I sigh and said, "Kina Sarina lang, dad. Mag-uusap lang kami."

  Natahimik ito ng ilang minuto bago ako nilapitan. "I've noticed na palagi nalang kayong magkasama. It's bugging me."

  Napataas ako ng kilay sa narinig. "We are friends, dad."

  "Talaga?" he strictly asked.

  Knowing I can't lie, nagsalita na lang ako. "Fine. It's more than that. Pero we are not yet together."

  "That's good."

  Napakunot ang noo ko sa narinig. "What?"

  "It's good na you both are not together since you and her should stop pursuing this."

  "Dad, what are you talking about?"

  He took a step back and crossed his arms in his chest. "I've let you run around and play that lesbian thing because I know you'll come into your sense na it's just a phase. Now that I know it's getting worse, I'm doing you a favor." He looks so proud of what he said that I almost laugh at how stupid he sounded. Really? He is my sperm donor? Is the world for real?

  Nanlaki ang mata ko. "Ano? What kind of favor is that? You know clearly na hindi ito phase lang!"

  "Do not raise your voice at me, young lady! I demand you give me respect."

  "No, dad. You're being too much. What the heck is wrong with being a lesbian?"

  "Everything! Lesbians and gays and shits like that are sins! People who embrace it are a disgrace to the world. "

  Mapakla akong napatawa sa narinig. I can't believe I'm having this argument with my father who got himself a degree. A genius with no brain fucking cell. "First of all, what sin are you referring to? I believe for a fact that it is not written in the commandments, nor it is stated in the book. And second, why are you suddenly grilling me? You always do things that ruin everything!"

  "You do not dare say those things, Maurice. You don't even know what you're doing! Stop being a disappointment!"

  Para akong nasampal sa narinig. Alam ko namang mahirap i-please ang ama namin, kaya nga hindi ko na ito sinubukan. Pero ang marinig ito mismo sa bibig niya ay nakakabigla.

  Mapakla akong napatawa sa kanya. "Disappointment? Really? Dad, why do you love to make us feel like shit? Ha?"

  I can sense his anger boiling from here. He can explode any minute now, I know it because his hands are formed in a tight fist. "I am telling you, Maurice. Stop this nonsense. You are not a lesbian, anak. For once, sundin mo naman ako."

  Instead of cowering away, hinarap ko ito. "I'm always following your orders, dad! Is it not enough? And I am telling you, dad, na I am a lesbian. I like girls, gusto ko ang babae. If you don't want to accept that, then fine, go stay under the rock you are forcing yourself to live in. Be a fucking homophobic." Umikot ako para lumakad pero narinig ko ang tawag nito.

  "Do not turn your back on me! I am your father and I have the power to take everything I gave to you right here, right now. "

  Tinignan ko ito ng deretso sa mata. Kung noon I'm afraid of him, now I'm not. He's always proving himself to be the shittiest dad on earth, and he's doing it so well I want to applaud him. Gosh, I bet even his own parents are tired of him.