Agent Lamerok

Parachutes

The trainees' task today, was skydiving. Well, really just jumping out of an aeroplane. I was in the plane with them, I wasn't wearing a parachute since I wasn't jumping, but I had one just in case.

Roxy seemed nervous, she was holding onto her parachute for dear life. Eggsy and her were talking, he seemed like he trying to comfort her but I couldn't be bothered to listen. "Your task is to land inside the K without the radar detecting you. If you get read of the radar or you don't make it inside the target, you go home." I shout over the sound of the aeroplane. 

"Is that understood?" They all nod avoiding looking at me. "Drop zone, coming up," Merlin says over my glasses. I look at the time on my glasses, "Drop zone coming up, 20 seconds." I repeat to all of them. They all get up, they're shuffling around and Charlie and his boys go up to the front, pushing Eggsy and Roxy down to the back. "All of you, play nice," I yell to them. As much as I despise Charlie, I do admire his confidence. Of course, he doesn't have a brain, a brain would be a good thing to have if he is to become the next Lancelot. They all groan and the light turns green, "Go, go, go!" I yell to them. Roxy steps back a bit, scared of jumping down. Eggsy was shaking her and yelling, "Roxy," She looked at me worriedly. 

"I checked all of the parachute's at least 6 times, go. You will be fine." I yelled. "Exactly. Look, follow me, yeah?" Eggsy says and falls backwards out of the plane. If only he knew what I had in store for him, he was going to be pissed. But, I'm okay with that. "Roxy," I warned and she looked back at me. She finally hesitantly jumped, "Merlin, they're all yours." I tapped my glasses. "Thank you, Lamerok. Meet me back on the ground, and make note of anything you think is important." Merlin says back. 

I nod and go back to the pilot, "Back down to the car, please," The pilot nods and drastically turns the plane around. I go and buckle a seat belt down to make sure I don't fall and listen to the trainees, they were all yelling and enjoying themselves. And it made me smile, I was looking through my glasses and watching what they were seeing, and seeing how close they were to the ground. "My, my, you're all very cheerful. Did you really think it was going to be that straightforward?" Merlin makes his introduction. 

I smirk at his introduction, "Any idiot can read a heads up display. A Kingsman agent needs to be able to solve problems under pressure." Merlin starts. "Like what to do when one of your group has no parachute," I say pressing my glasses. I laugh as they all start panicking, "Oh, shit!" "Fuck!" "Fucking..." "No parachute?" "Who?" "Fuck!" "What do we do?" Charlie yells. "I told you, aim for the target. Come in under the radar. I hope not to be scraping one of you up after, but if Merlin or I do have to and you're inside the target, just know we'll be very impressed." I said to them. 

"Fuck off, Lamerok!" Charlie yells in frustration. "You'll thank me someday," I said laughing as the plane reaches the ground. "Thank you," I ran off the plane and into the car that was taking me to the landing site. They all eventually came up with a plan to pair up and pull their parachute's one by one, "Rufus, come on!" Eggsy yelled. "Shit, I can't." Rufus pulled his parachute and sighed in relief. 

"Shit, we're at an odd number now!" Eggsy yells. They form a circle and decide to pull their parachute's one by one and to pair off with the person who doesn't have a parachute. 

"Good plan, Eggsy. 30 seconds, come on, now, hurry!" Merlin comments. "Make sure to pull off in an orderly fashion," I added again seriously. All of them pulled their parachutes and it was down to Eggsy and Roxy. I already knew who didn't have a parachute, since it was my idea. Roxy pulled her parachute and Eggsy started panicking, "Shit! FUCK!" He yelled grabbing onto her. 

"No!" He kept letting out a string of curses. I got out of the car and started walking over to Merlin's office. 

-

Eventually, they all land, some inside the target and some not. They all stood up as we made out way to the target, although Roxy had a hard time standing up. Merlin looks confused, "Roxy's afraid of heights." He nodded and we approached them. "Fall in." They all stood together. Merlin took his clipboard, "Hugo, Digby. You don't land inside the K, you're not in the K. Rufus, you opened too early. You were all over the radar." Merlin informs them. 

"All three of you, pack your bags, go home, get lost," I said as they just walked off and got pissed off. "Now, Eggsy, Roxy. Congratulations, you set a new record." I congratulated them as Eggsy looked at both of us, pissed. "Opening at 300 feet or less, that's pretty ballsy. Congratulations on completing another task. Fall out." Merlin orders. 

Although, Eggsy stayed behind. Oh, this should be good. "Sorry, sir, but why the fuck did you choose me as the gimp? Am I just the expandable candidate now?" Eggsy yells at Merlin as I just smirk. "Oh, no I didn't choose you. That was Agent Lamerok's idea." Merlin pats me on my shoulder. Eggsy looks at me pissed, as I just smirk. "Good luck dealing with that," Merlin whispers in my ear. "Oh, it won't be a problem," I said and he walked away staring at us. 

"Why the fuck did you choose me as the one then?" He glares at me. "No, no, no. You don't talk to me like that. You have a complaint, you come over here and you say it personally to me." I say to him pointing my finger. He shrugs and comes over to me as I glare at him and move my head over to his ear, "You need to take that chip off your shoulder." I said and reached down onto his bag, he tensed up and I pulled the extra parachute off of him. 

He got pulled back by the parachute as I smiled at him. He looked behind him to see a parachute, as I walked over to him and offered him a hand up. He looked at me, rolled his eyes, and grabbed my hand as I pulled him up, "I could've just left you for someone to clean up, but I didn't." I moved away from his ear and patted his chest. "Be grateful for that." I left him alone in the field inside the target.