A Teen's Guide to Life

You only need one face dear

Before I start this, I just want to say that I really do love my mom but the whole two facing thing is just an exaggeration of what really happened.
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Hey. How's life going for you? So this time instead doing all of my morning routine at once, I individually did each task and then slapped my brother.
See? I make sacrifices.

Anyways, todays guide is all about those no good, rotten, dirty, two-timing two faces. And before any of you get excited, no honey we are not talking about the Two Face in Batman. So pipe the heck down. Here, have a Harley Quinn cookie. Happy?

What do you mean you also want a Joker cookie? Ungrateful brat.

If you don't have one of these, then there is something seriously wrong with your world. Then again, you aren't really missing out at all. You have been blessed by God.

Unfortunately in this world, we have this thing called lying. It actually works, and people use it all the time to lure poor unsuspecting children into white vans by telling them they have candy. Of course then, the kid dances off towards the white van even though their mommy has told them multiple times to run like chicken when they see a white van. Which might not turn out well if the mom herself has a white van but that's a story for later.

Anyways the kid runs in only for the doors to slam close. Naturally, this comes to the whole dramatic scene of "Hey what's the deal? Where's the candy?" In which the kidnapper responds with an evil laugh and drives off. But I'm getting off topic so let's backtrack.

Two faces are those people who made Pretty Little Liars seem like a joke. These people will suck you up only to toss you into the trashcan. (Okay so maybe I'm over exaggerating.)

One time (it was today) my mom was so angry at me. So naturally, when you're angry at someone you scream like you're Black Canary and your poor victim is someone innocently robbing a bank. (What do you robbing a bank? I wasn't robbing anything! I was just...... checking the security systems...)

It was full out screaming, yelling, trying to rip hair out and everything. Suddenly the phone rings and the next thing you know, her every hair is perfectly placed, her make up flawless and the million watt smile back on her face. There is no sign of Black Canary anywhere, this is Dinah Laurel Lance speaking, and I stand there in shock because she fucking went from Sharkeisha to barbie doll in two seconds. Then I get the hell out of there because I had the last word and I was going to leave before she can one up me. Besides, I had a loot to take with me. It's not everyday Black Canary gets distracted enough for you to safely get away. But my point is she just freaking two faced right. In. Front. of. Me.

So guys, don't be a two face.
Who knows. Maybe one day if you keep going, someone will throw acid at your face and make you wonder where is the nearest plastic surgeon?

Which will probably transition to
"Where the hell is my damn coin?"

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I know it's short but I really just typed this up to rant about what my mom did so.... there will probably be a better Two Face chapter later on but I mean..
Great job Lucy, you made everything worse. So uh, like, comment, and all that fun stuff and you'll get a sticker!

Lucy