2 heartbroken teens

36

Watching my mum preparing some coffee for the two of us makes me remember my life before I moved out,  when one of my bigger worries was studying for an exam the day before.  Actually, here, being with her in the kitchen, is were I feel at home the most. Yes, I love independence and being in a house with my closest friends, but I know that if I ever fall apart, my mum will receive me anytime. 

Maybe I'm at that point of being, in a way, drifted away.

It's been three days since I was fired, and I know I gotta tell mum, so that's why I decided to come. The money that I was gaining was invested in maintaining myself throughout the gap year. And because it's not even winter yet, I need to find another full time job soon.

 I was pleased that my brother wasn't also here. For what my mum has told me, he hasn't visited her since the first day he came and we had our first confrontation in a very long time. I don't know how much she knows the reasons why he's in town, if she even has heard the truth behind his selfish ass, but for better I won't ask her. 

"So, any news? Are you guys keeping the house clean?" I chuckle. She places the cup in front of me and I take a sip.

"The cleanest we can." I say jokingly. She shakes her head and smiles. "Mum." I then say, my lips in a straight line. "I..., I was fired the other day..." I avoid eye contact the maximum possible.

"Why?" She doesn't sound angry, yet her tone is very in disbelief.

Kaleb appeared and acted like a complete asshole, I want to say.

"Doesn't matter." I shrug. "I'll find something soon." I do hope so. Mum sighs.

"Haven't you thought about college, Vinnie?, maybe it's some kind of sign that you could study something you like-"

"Mum, please, no. I'm good where I am."

"And I believe you but, you know, as a mum I worry about this kind of stuff..."

"I know." I take another sip. 

"Okay. Well then, tell me when you find something that pays you enough." I nod. At least I'm grateful that my mum is supportive with my decisions.

"Have you knew recently anything related to Kaleb? I'm also worried if he's doing good." She then says. Shit. For some reason I had the confidence that a conversation about him wouldn't come out. I believed wrong.

"You don't need to. He decided to leave a while ago with dad, so it's no longer a responsibility."

"But I'm still his mother and you're still his big brother." She continues in a calm voice. "Don't you want him to be good despite your differences?"

"I really don't." I answer without hesitation. How many times I have to make clear that I stopped considering him part of the family. Now it's only my mother and I, what is necessary. "He's living with some other guys in a big house, that's all I know." I lie.

"Have you been there?."

"No, and I don't want to. I just heard it from a friend of a friend." I lie again. I just want to end this conversation as soon as possible. 

"Well, at least he's not sleeping under a bridge. That soothes me." Fuck, if she knew..., but I don't want her to have a panic attack, precisely.

"Can I stay for the night?" I ask a minute after, changing the subject.

"Of course, son. You don't even have to ask." Her lips curves to a big smile. "We can watch a movie tonight if you want to." 

"Yeah, sure." I can't erase her excitement, so I don't mind.