TO BE ALONE: a series of måneskin oneshots

twenty first birthday (d.d.)

felonyparxxx

On the way home from rehearsal, Damiano made sure to stop at the florist by his and your shared apartment. Your birthday had been the day before, and he wanted to surprise you with flowers as a sort of continued birthday present. 

Damiano entered the florist and was immediately hit in the face with the scents of the store’s entire inventory of flowers. Roses and daisies lined shelves, accompanied by baby’s breath bouquets and lily displays. 

Damiano approached the counter, earning a startled look from the employee. His dark tattoos and eyeliner were in a stark contrast to the colorful blooms around the shop. Damiano couldn’t blame the employee for her fright, however, because how often do rockstars frequent florists?

Damiano ordered a dozen red roses, and gleefully left the shop with a beautifully wrapped bouquet, certain that you will love it. 

“Bambina!” Damiano called. “I’m home!” He slumped his bags to the floor, holding the flowers higher up in the air, so as to not smash them against his bags. Damiano laid the flowers delicately on the kitchen table and wandered around the home to find you. 

“Baby?” Damiano asked, peeking through the bedroom door that you had propped open. Damiano’s eyes widened at the sight in the room.

You were curled up on the mattress, clinging to the blankets as you brought your knees to your chest. 

He frowned and immediately sprung into action. "Hey, baby, what's wrong?" Damiano knelt at the side of the bed, pressing his hand lovingly against your knee. 

Your lungs burnt for oxygen as you tried your best to gulp in air. Your mind was full of television static and the room was spinning. 

"(Y/N)..." Damiano coaxed, crawling into the bed beside you. He cradled your shaking body into his strong arms, stroking your hair as you cried. "Breathe, Sweetheart."

You dropped the blankets and now gripped at Damiano's shirt. Your breaths came more steadily as you took in his familiar scent, but you still were breathing unevenly, breathing quickly as your heart was still racing. 

"I'm turning into my mother!" You sobbed into Damiano's arms. 

Damiano's heart broke. He knew what you were alluding to. The previous night, you had celebrated your 21st birthday, with the entire band. The party was hosted at Ethan's house. The band threw you an absolute 21st birthday smash. Drinks, food, music, the whole nine yards, all ending in a bonfire. It was everything you could have imagined. 

As expected, you'd woken up the next morning with an awful hangover. Damiano said he would call rehearsal to take care of you, but you shooed him off, claiming that your birthday was only a one night event, and that life must move on. 

"What happened, baby, what's wrong?" Damiano coaxed. "We were celebrating, baby, it was more than okay for you to drink." 

Damiano knew there had been alcohol and violence in your childhood and teenage years. He only met your family once, and it was the one day that your mother ever tried to put on a good face. You didn't know if you blamed your mother or not, losing a spouse couldn't be easy, especially not with three kids. 

"Breathe, baby. In...and out." Damiano mimicked deep, deep breaths for you to take as your mind spun. Soft kisses on the top of your head brought you back to reality when your mind would slip away.

You despise your father for letting your mother treat you and your siblings as awfully as she did their whole time in the home. He was gone now, and you couldn't change that, but you hated him for being idle. He watched it all happen, and never said anything. He never pushed your mother to get help, or to stay in AA, he just let your family fall to ruins. 

It was a godsend when Damiano came into your life, and absolutely saved you.

"No, this morning!" You tearfully explained, your breaths finally coming down to a place where you could talk. 

Damiano frowned, snuggling you tighter. "What happened this morning, (Y/N)? When I was gone?" 

You nodded, sniffling hard. "I-I had an awful headache, and Advil wasn't helping, and I remember...remembered that my mom would just...just drink through her hangovers. So when you left, I poured myself another, another glass of wine." You stammered through your story, watching Damiano's face droop in sadness. "And it was two glasses, then three, because it tasted good."

"Oh, baby." Damiano coaxed, rubbing your back. "Don't feel bad. You were coping in the only way you've ever been shown." 

You didn't listen, you couldn't fight past the racing thoughts you were having. "And what if I can't control myself, and I'm going to start hurting you, and I'm going to get kicked out of school, and--" 

"Shh, (Y/N), amore, none of that is going to happen." Damiano reassured you. "I promise you that you won't turn into your mother." He rubbed your hair, tilting your head up to look at him. 

"Breathe, honey. I know you didn't mean harm with what happened today, okay? It was an accident, and you didn't know any better." He explained slowly, kissing your face as he spoke. 

You nodded, wiping your tears away with your sleeve. "I guess so." 

"Stay here." Damiano spoke, giving you one last kiss before you left the room. 

You suddenly felt more empty than ever with his presence gone. Thankfully he returned soon with a vase of roses and a glass of water in his hands. 

"I got you these to keep the birthday celebration going." He smiled softly. "But I think they'd look better in here, than in the kitchen."

You sipped at the glass of water that he handed you, relishing in the coolness of the drink against your raw throat. 

You smiled at the flowers, then back at your loving boyfriend. "Thank you so much for the flowers." You nearly broke out into tears again. 

"Of course, baby." Damiano smiled, kissing your lips. "Do you want somethin' to eat, or just to lay down?" 

You watched as he stripped of his coat and shoes, something that he didn't do earlier. He was focused on keeping you safe. 

"Just lay." You stated, returning under the covers. "You can go if you have things to do, I'll be okay alone." You stated, feeling bad that he had to come home from a stressful rehearsal to this. 

"No, baby." Damiano kissed your forehead. "This is what I'm here for. I don't want to be anywhere else." 

He dimmed the lights and held you close. Within moments, you were slipping asleep. 

"Happy birthday, baby." He finished with a kiss before falling asleep, as well. 

~~~~~

WORD COUNT
1131