Stay in hiding-Revamp

a secret can only be kept so long

"Do not tell secrets to those whose faith and silence you have not already tested"

Lies.

Lies and secrets. That was all that was running through Haileys mind. As silence sliced through the air. What was she supposed to do?

Jay stared at her before realising it probably wasn't helping her and nor was the harsh tones he'd been taking with her. He settled his voice and tried again

"Hailey?" Her eyes flicked up to him before they flew back down before he could noticed the panicked tears rushing from her eyes.

"Jay can we just go do our jobs? Please" her voice cracked as she turned and started to head out the door but Jay caught her wrist. Using it as leverage to hook onto her hip and spin her around. Or thats what he would've done if he hadn't been met with a yelp of pain from Hailey.

"Okay. Okay im sorry. Can we talk about this when we get home then?" He attempted to reason with her and with the affirming nod, it seemed he got through. "Okay. Come on then let's go"

He led her out. The entire way there and back Hailey was the most silent he'd ever seen her. It worried him.
What worried her was that he was getting closer to figuring out. And she was getting closer to having no where to live.

But surprisingly it wasn't Jay who found out first. Or put things together, she wasn't quite sure how he did it. She thought Vanessa would have been the one to put things together first or Jay, or even voight.

But when they got back and Kevin pulled her into a room, the last thing she expected was for him to tell her he knew.

"What's he doing to you?" Kevin's smooth voice whispered in the closed room. He'd led her down to an empty hall and ensured no one would be around.
"What?" She honest to everything plausible on earth had no idea what he was talking about. Nothing clicked and she stood there in stunned silence.
"Hailey I'm gonna talk, your gonna listen okay?" She nodded and he continued "Hailey, 9 weeks ago you came to work with a bruised eye and arm and said you fell down the stairs" realisation dawned on her as she attempted to back herself into a wall. But Kevin helled firm but gentle.
"I thought it was weird okay? Thought it was a bit strange but ignored it. Dumb mistake. I didnt pick up on anything else till the flowers came. And then when Brad came."

Flowers...her mind flashed back to the dandelions and roses she'd found on her desk the other day. Then as if a devil had tickled a puzzle piece till it slipped into its spot, she realised what had happened. Kevin had accepted them for her on her behalf. He must've read the card. As if reading her mind he spoke again.

"I had read the card to tease you about who had sent it. I knew it had been your boyfriend but in all honesty I had forgot his name. So I read it to figure it out. And I saw what was on the card. So im gonna ask you a question and your gonna answer truthfully this time okay?" Another nod. She had yet to speek but in all fairness he told her not to.

"How long has your boyfriend, Bradley Cooper, been abusing you?"

Everything crashed. He knew. Someone on her team knew. What the hell was she supposed to do? Everything, the cleverly planned lies, the self punishment, the excuses, the weeks of faked out team nights out she had missed out on. All of it. The entire facade. Crashed down in one simple sentence. A question. Even.

And one she didnt know how to answer. And so she stuttered. I's and um's being the only things out of her mouth. How was she supposed to answer that? It wasn't a yes no question and to be honest? She didn't know when it started. So to give a confirming or even ballparked idea of how long would be impossible.

And Kevin realised this. So he changed his question to let her take over. It was a simple trick they both knew was used to give victims of abuse the idea of power when they come out about there story.

"Hailey. Is your boyfriend, Bradley Cooper, abusing you?" She wanted to say no. She wanted to run away or cry or something. But she couldn't stop it. She couldn't stop as her neck engaged and she nodded. Eyes boring into the floor so she didn't have to see the disappointment she was sure was currently on his face.

But his face was instead, one of fury as he moved to push past her.
Finally the first words he had heard from her in the past 10 minutes slipped out.
"Wait, where are you going?" His voice was harsh and short.
"Voight and Jay" the words spread fear along her spine as she threw herself infront of him.
"NO! No no no no you can't.. please" something dawned on him then.
"Wait...hailey? Does Jay not know?" She shook her head and spewed excuses of why he could never know. None of which he was listening to.

"Hailey, your sleeping in the same APARTMENT as him. Every night! You eat there, you sleep there, you drink there. How have you been keeping it a secret? How have you been keeping the bruising i am SURE is currently all over your skin. A secret. And how can you expect to keep it up?" She hadn't thought about any of what he was saying.

"I dont, I cant. I cant tell him Kev. He'll hate me. I can't, I-" she was starting to panic now. Flame spread through her  chest as a band constricted her lungs. She couldn't breathe. She needed to breathe. She took deep breaths in but the only sound coming in and out was a deep weezing.

"Hailey. Hailey look at me. Deep breaths. In and out" it took her a few minutes to realise she was now sat on a bench and Kevin was calming her. A few minutes later and she was back to breathing okay.
"Hailey do you really think Jay is going to hate you when he finds out-"
"-if. If he finds out" she corrected. Only to be hit back with the same

"No Hailey. When. You are walking around his apartment, the same apartment that gets hot as hell when people are in there for five minutes. Im assuming your not sleeping in leggings and a hoodie?" That was true. She had been sleeping in shorts and a T-Shirt. It was risky but the only way she could sleep.
"One way or another hes going to find out. Whether its him seeing the bruises by accident or you telling him" she knew he was right. Hell he was speaking the most truth shed heard in a while. But insecurity took over and she refused.

"No. No no. No kev he can't know. He'll kick me out and hate me. He'll think..know im weak. He'll think I'm gross and disgusting and not strong cause of what he did to me. B-" she was going to say 'besides its my fault anyway' but didn't want the dumb lecture he was sure to give.

"Hailey. He's Jay. And he will not think any of those things. Hailey we see domestic abuse cases weekly. More so when we where in blues. We know" he corrected himself "he knows, that it isn't the victims fault"

"Im not a victim! And it isn't domestic abuse. It isn't. Its not" domestic abuse was a spouse or family member or roommate abusing a victim for no reason. In her eyes, he had a reason.

"Hailey-" he didn't want to go into any of this with her. Not cause he didn't want to. But because she needed to have this conversation with Jay. Not him. "Hailey. Please promise me. You will tell Jay. And then we will work together to get you away from Bradley okay?" She didn't want to.

She didnt want Jay to leave her when he found out. But reality was slowly seeping out that eventually he was going to find out and that terrified her. She knew the easiest blow would be for her to tell him. That way she can pack her bags and find a place to stay and not be blindsided when he kicks her out.

"Okay"

A/N: sorry for the late. VERY LATE update. I took a mental health break to write something else and I am so sorry I left you without. I was struggling to come up with an idea when this one popped up in my head. I'm hoping for more regular updates but I think I'm going to change my posting status to every 1-2 weeks instead of putting the pressure on myself to write it in 1.

About the story, Jay isn't going to find out for a while. No one else is. But I am going to start incorporating some other topics into it like guilt and insecurities from Hailey.

Hope you all enjoyed. Again sorry for the late upload. See you next week