Beautifully Obsessed

Chapter Thirty: Don't look back

19/02/2022

I am so excited to be back writing, thank you all so much for your patience while I finished my exams. Before reading this chapter I would just like to remind readers that things said by the main characters are not always true and that one should never feel pressurised into having sex. It is okay to say no and please if you do not feel ready than do not force yourself to for the appeasement of another.

I hope you enjoy!

~Aphrodite

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"I won't make a promise I know I can't keep"

I kept silent as he guided me back towards the table, I couldn't think of anything to say that could possibly make me feel better after that. It seemed anytime I was finally enjoying myself or felt the slightest bit of happiness it was ripped from me.

I could feel the tears sting at my eyes but I couldn't cry, not here, not now. Sitting down in my previous seat, my vision followed Noah as he crouched down in front of me, resting his hands on my knees.

"I'm sorry little bug, I didn't mean to upset you on your special day" he stroked the fabric resting on my knee, his other hand reaching up to stroke the skin of my cheek. "B-but, when you love someone you don't hurt them, you-you're meant to want to protect them from all the hurt in the world, do you, do you not love me anymore?" I sniffled.

I could see the flash of pain pass through his eyes as his they flitted to the floor below us. "It's the only way I've ever been taught to show love, through pain, I don't, I can't" I reached my hand so now it was my hand that rested upon his cheek as I watched him struggle to find the words he needed to. "I'm not normal Embry, but I'm not stupid either, I know there are things wrong with me, but you" his eyes met mine as he pulled my hand from his face and cradled it between his two, "you make me feel normal, with you I never have to think about how messed up I am."

Don't fall for it. Don't fall for it. Don't fall for it.

Too late.

I couldn't help it, all I could see was a scared lonely child who just needed to be loved. Pulling us both up to stand, I threw my arms around his torso, clinging onto him tightly, there had always been a part of me that needed to be the things that no one had been for me. Things like comforting, forgiving and understanding. Things that were going to get me hurt.

He had held me just as tightly as we rested in each other's embrace for a while, not letting go until Evelyn had called us over to cut the cake together. So I smiled and forgave, continuing to pretend. Just for now.

The rest of the celebration had passed quite quickly, the next thing I knew everybody was cheering around us once again as we walked back into the house. I wasn't exactly very familiar with wedding rituals but I had just always assumed people had stayed for most of the night, now it was only around 4pm and it was ending. My body was buzzing with nerves, I didn't want to think of why but ignoring them didn't settle them anymore so than acknowledging them would have.

Coming to a halt in the hallway, my gaze fell on the suitcases stacked by the door in confusion. Before I could question it Noah was already explaining, "it's not a wedding without a honeymoon" he winked, pulling off his suit jacket and tie. Don't roll up the sleeves, don't roll up the sleeves.

Gulping I watched as he half rolled up the sleeves of his shirt. Curse his very beautiful genes. Oh sweet Jesus Embry, get it together, you're acting like a dog in heat. "Embry, you okay?" he innocently questioned.