Tittle: THE TALK I NEVER HAD WITH MY PAPA
"What's up guys,nagbabalik ang inyong reyna,Reina Santos." Maligaya kung bati.
I'm starting to vlog when I'm just a high school student, and now I am college.
"This vlog will be 'Talk that I never had with my Papa'. I have the list of question in this paper." I said while showing the paper I am holding. "Madami dami ata 'to" I joked.
Close kami ni Papa,as in close. My mother died ng maipanganak ako. Minsan iniisip ko din na ako ang may kasalan kung bat siya nawala,pero wala na akong magagawa.
"So, Here's my father. As you know he's a lawyer, kaya sa nag babalak diyan na saktan ako. Kilalanin niyo binabangga niyo." I said in the camera while chuckling.
Umupo ang papa ko sa harap,he have this smiled in face. Alam kong busy siya sa trabaho pero napagbigyan niya parin ako. He's my ideal man.
"Hello,kinabahan naman ako bigla." He said. "Personal ba yan?" He asked while adjusting the sleeve s of his dress-skirt.
"Depends Papa. Dapat honest sagot ah." Sabi ko while staring at him.
"Sure. Always truth." He assured.
"So let's start." I said. "Oh, by the way he's my ideal man. Tinatanong niyo yan sakin before kung ano ang ideal man ko. My ideal man is the man like my Papa." I said, have a shy smile.
"Pa,first question: Ano po yung reaksiyon mo nong una niyong nalaman na buntis si Mama sakin." Nakatingin kung tanong. Sa mata ng tatay ko ay may alinlangan hindi ko alam kung saan nanggagaling. "Pa,basic question palang yan. Bakit parang kinakabahan ako sa itsura mo." I joked again.
He smiled."Yung totoo ba?"
"Yes 'Pa." I sigh. "Kinakabahan naman ako 'Pa" biro ko sa kanya.
" Takot,syempre. Baka kase hindi kita mabuhay,alam mo yun? Takot na baka hindi ako maging best Papa."
"Really?" I smiled."Pero the best naman kayo." Sabi ko sa kanya.
"Next question, What is your biggest mistake?"
Napalunok si Papa. "My biggest mistake is, nag desisyon ako noon na ipalaglag ka." Umiwas siya ng tingin. May alinlangang ngiti pa sa labi.
Nagulat naman ako sa sagot niya,bakit parang ako na yung kakabahan sa mga isasagot niya?
"Bakit niyo naman po naisip yun?" I curiosly asked. Every action have a hundred excuse.
"Anak,kase nung time na yun, hindi pa talaga kami handa ng mommy mo."
"Pero mahal niyo naman ang isa't isa diba?"
"We were just a acquaintance that time."
Parang may nakaharang na kung ano sa lalamuna ko.
"Okay,so... In short hindi niyo planado?" I looked at him in the eye. Tumango naman siya. "Okay,move on tayo sa next question." Nawala talaga ang timpla ko pero tatay ko yung kaharap, I need to be okay.
"What is the epic move you do before?"
"Really? Naalala ko na man yung araw na yun. Ewan ko ba kung bakit nangyari 'yon."
"So,what is it nga?" I asked kase he is answering undirect to the point.
"When I fainted. When I first saw you in Nursery room,buti nalang daw at may nurse na nakakita."ngiting ngiti niya iyong sinabi. "Dun ko talaga narealize yung mga nangyre, na kahit hindi namin planado na dalhin ka dito sa mundo,tinanggap ka naman agad nito." He smiled.
"So, I am really sorry for what I've been decided before. And I am thankfull that you wake me up in my nightmares,anak." He said,holding my hands tightly. "Kung ang unang disesyon ko noon para sayo ay wasakin ka, ngayon naman ay all I want is you to be free,happy and whole. Gusto kong sakin ka lalapit pag umiiyak kana kase nakakapagod ang mundo, I want you to depend on me more."
"Pero alam kong dadating ang time that you will need to be independent and make your own family pero yun ata ang hindi ko pa kayang tanggapin." He chuckled. " I want to see you flying,spreading your wings and free to do what you want,but I am not ready yet. Give papa more time." He hugged me " I love you anak. I'm really sorry" He whispered.
Hindi ka pa man humihingi ng tawad, hindi ka pa man nagsisisi,hindi mo pa man naiisip na mali ang ginawa mo,napatawad na kita,papa.
---
