black coffee | remus lupin [2]

50. meetings & authors

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"SIT NEXT TO ME AND NICOLAS, don't talk unless he asks you something and definitely don't let go of my hand," Regulus said to Claudia right before they left for her first ever Death Eater meeting.

Merlin, she was nervous. Her heart was beating out of her chest, and she considered just not going, but she also knew that that would only lead to consequences she didn't want, so she decided to go.

She wondered if he, as in the Dark Lord, could sense fear. He couldn't get inside her head, though, she knew that. She would spend the entire meeting making sure he couldn't by using the tricks Regulus had taught her.

Even so, Claudia was convinced that he somehow knew something. That he somehow knew that she wasn't on his side, not really.

The thought of it made her sick to her stomach, so she knew that she had to put up an act the entire time. She just didn't know how she was going to manage. But she had to either way.

"Okay," Claudia nodded, grabbing his hand as she stood in the dark hallway with tired eyes.

"You tired?" Regulus asked.

She nodded, "Exhausted. David and I have been trying to figure out the whole vault-Horcrux-thing all day, but we can't think of anything."

"Don't beat yourself up for it," Regulus said softly. "Let's just get through this meeting and then we can worry about the other stuff."

"But..."

"But...?"

"Being a Death Eater and all doesn't exactly involve just attending meetings, does it?"

"No," Regulus replied with a small wince. "Of course not. I haven't been joining in much lately because he already knows he can trust me since I borrowed him Kreacher, but...we still need to do everything he tells us."

"Everything?" Claudia asked with worried eyes.

"I'm not letting you kill anybody," Regulus said sternly. "Okay?"

"Okay..." she nodded slowly, her head hanging low. "Have you, uh-"

"No," he said with a frown. "Of course I haven't. I would've told you. But...I have hurt people. Only if other Death Eaters were there and expected me to, of course, but..."

"It's okay," Claudia said as she gave his hand a squeeze.

"I know you were thrown into this whole thing out of nowhere and that you probably don't understand what's going on," Regulus said. "I probably should've told you more than I did. But I was trying to keep you out of it...and now I can't anymore."

"It's not your fault."

"It kind of is, isn't it?"

"Well...no," she said. "I know I blamed you for not saving me or whatever, but what the hell were you supposed to do about it anyway? It's not like you could tell him to stay away from me. It's my fathers fault. Everything is. Okay?"