Drummer Boy | Dominic Fike

18

selah's pov

"are you sure you're ready?" the doctor asked me. my eyes brimmed with tears because i knew it wasn't my child's fault for me being clumsy and conceiving.

but i knew if i brought my baby into the world she would most likely be just a miserable as me right now.

"yes,"

and she began her process of sucking the soul and life from inside my stomach and into a cold steel pan.

i felt kind of numb. like i had no emotion; no feeling.

dom had damaged me so badly, i knew what i was doing was best for the child and i. i wouldn't want to bring the baby into a situation like this.

and also the fact i was mad that i was spending half of my insurance to get this abortion.

just another thing i needed in life.

soon i didn't feel the uncomfortable suction from the tube . but i sure did feel empty.

"alright all done," she smiled. but i could tell that she sort of hated her job. having to suck fetus out of people daily didn't sound totally ideal.

"thank you," i hiccuped. only because i was trying to hide the fact that i had a lump in my throat from wanting to burst out in tears.

i felt like dom had won . he got the best of me and was the reason all this was happening in the first place.

i got up from my seat, the burning pain instantly piercing through my vagina causing me to wince.

"that'll only be slightly uncomfortable for a few hours, dear," the doctor reassured me.

i just nodded and lead myself out of the door.

finally arriving at my apartment, praise the lord that my parents had already gone back home about a week ago.

and that i also hadn't talked to emma, or the twins since i had last seen them.

and for dominic. i was trying my hardest not to think about him. the way he was so uncontrollably childish.

i never understood why i ever have him a chance in the first place. giving the fact he started out like douche bag begging for attention.

the way he called me out in class that very first day. i should have known. but it's my own cowardly mistake.

his first impression should have been enough evidence on who he was as a person.

and that was where it was my fault.

looking in the bathroom mirror. forcing myself to see some sort of change in me from the abortion.

but i saw nothing but the same girl that caught feelings stupidly enough for someone who would never feel the same.

so i stripped from my clothes and hopped into the shower.

and small trickles of blood running down my legs from the soreness.

tears brimmed in my eyes feeling the guilt of taking an innocent life away just because i make dumb decisions.

i wanted to reverse time and say "no, i'm not ready," and raise the baby and be a mother.

as i was supposed to be. but the weakness of letting dom win over me over powered.

resulting in me losing what could have possibly been the best thing for me. and maybe even an eye opener.

i did regret what i did. but i knew deep down i had to do it. so that i wouldn't have suffered the fact that i would always have a part of dom with me no matter where i would go.

so i sat down in the shower and let water run down my face, letting it mix with my tears.

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ps. i wrote this was work lol