CLOUDED ➣ JINKOOK ✓

FORTY-THREE

He knows he should say something, but he can't bring himself to.

Seokjin is slick. The way he swiftly takes control of every conversation, shrugging Namjoon off and quickly switching topics.

Namjoon wants to know what happened that night Seokjin came home in tears. That night his little brother was so angry with him he was afraid they would never talk again came home wanting nothing more than for him to hold him.

He isn't ready to find out. He's unsure of what he'd even do.

Fuck up whoever dare hurt his brother or, depending on the situation, act like a dick and get angry with Seokjin again.

He can't bring himself to be mad or yell at Seokjin much anymore, especially after that day.

He's always had a soft spot for his baby brother. Growing up, he made sure to take care of the younger boy. He doted and spoiled Seokjin so much.

Seokjin has grown up indeed. He's become even more handsome with striking features. He's tall with a lean body and big strong shoulders that people swoon over.

All the while, Namjoon can see are those chubby cheeks and doe-like eyes that he saw when Seokjin first came home from the hospital twenty-three years ago.

It's hard to see Seokjin as anything else besides his baby brother, and that's how it will always be.

Maybe he was too stringent and definitely way too mean. He tries to think back if he'd ever lashed out on the younger like that. The older hasn't, and he sees why now. He swears to himself he won't ever again.

It's nice to see Seokjin talking to his friends and posting the things he likes again, but he knows his brother. He knows Seokjin is avoiding something or someone, and he can't force things to get better; he'll certainly try his damn best to help.

Namjoon taps on the open door frame three times, gaining the younger's attention.

A small smile graces Seokjin's face as he looks up at the older. "Yes, hyung?" He asks.

Namjoon lets out a sigh. "I'm just wondering if you'd like to come back to band practices soon. Everyone misses you. We definitely need your and Hobi's happy energy to get us through the day."

Something flashes in Seokjin's eyes. A look of uncertainty on his face as he says nothing.

"Seokjin?" Namjoon calls.

"They miss me?' He questions, putting an emphasis on the word they.

Namjoon frowns, a bit confused. "Yes. Yoongi, Hobi and Jeongguk."

Saying Jeongguk's name makes him frown, and the tip of his tongue burns, the words fizzling out slowly like he didn't want to mention him at all. His disdain runs deep for that boy.

"Oh," Seokjin murmurs, contemplating saying anything. "I do miss Hobi..."

Namjoon chuckles, his deep dimples showing. "He'd be very happy to hear that. So what do you say?"

The younger sighs, "Yeah, I want to hang out with you guys again."

"You sure?" Namjoon questions and he nods hesitantly.

Namjoon gives the younger another smile. He goes to turn away, but something about that didn't feel right.

Something is off with Seokjin, so he turns back, serious eyes set on the younger.

"You know you can talk to me whenever, right, Seokjin?" He questions, eyebrows knitted together in concern.

"Of course, hyung," he mumbles.

"Seriously, Seokjin-ah. I'm not angry anymore. I won't get mad at you for whatever happened. Hyung is just worried about you, that's all," Namjoon says with sincerity.

That guilty feeling eats at Seokjin again as a tight-lipped smile pulls onto his face.

"I'm okay, hyung. I promise."

Another lie.

He wishes it would all stop.