A Walk to Eden

29

"Sam what's wrong?" I ask. He just stares at me. "Sam?" He doesn't look away.

"Can we talk later?" He whispers.

"Yeah?" I answer. "What's wrong though?" He just shakes his head. We order food and eat with Eden talking about whatever.

Did I do something? I don't think I did.

"Here's your check." The waitress hands us our tab and Sam pays for it.

"Thank you for paying." I smile at me. But he just nods. We leave and it's silent on the way home. We pull up to the house and I turn around and look at Eden. She's slumped over in her sleep snoring away.

"Oh Eden." I softly giggle to myself.

"Is she asleep?" Sam asks.

"Yep." I turn back and look at him, but he's already climbing out of the car. I sigh and climb out myself, and I turn and see him carrying Eden inside. I follow them in and set my bags down. I hear Sam talking and I quietly sneak to watch him.

"Night Eden. See you in the morning. I love you." He leans down and kisses her temple. He's so loving when it comes to her. She could light the world on fire and he wouldn't care. He tucks the blanket over her and walks out. He closes the door and turns to me.

"Sam?" I look up at him. "You said we needed to talk?" He nods and walks past me and into the kitchen. He leans against the counter. "Did I do something wrong?" He turns around and shakes his head.

"No." He runs his hand over his face.

"Then what is it?" I ask. My stomach is turning, and I feel like I'm going to be sick. He just stares at me for a moment.

"Are you pregnant?" He asks. My face drops and I feel the blood drain from me. I swallow. He sees me react, and His eyes widen and he stands up. "Are you?"

"I.. I don't know." I look down. My hands start to shake. "I don't know." I run my hands through my hair. I see his feet walk to me, and I feel his arms wrap around me. My head goes to his chest and I grip his shirt.

"Hey, hey. It's okay." He whispers in my hair. I shaking. "It's alright." He leans back and little and hooks his finger under my chin and tilts my head up. "Do you want me to get a test?" He asks. I nod. "Okay." He kisses my forehead and then tilts his onto mine. "It's gonna be okay. I'm sorry for scaring you, or making you think I was upset. It's just, Eden said something and it made me think."

"Good thinking? Or bad?" I mumble.

"Both. But mostly good." He softly smiles and I hug him tight. "I'm gonna go get a test. I'll be back." I nod and let go, and he leaves. I sit on the couch and brake down.

How could I be so stupid. He's going to think I'm just a girl that sleeps around and gets knocked up every chance she gets. I glance back at the clock and see it's been 20 minutes since he left. As if he was cued, I hear Sam pull into the driveway. My nerves flare up again when I hear him open the door.

"Hey." He takes his shoes off. I'm so scared I can't speak. I stand up. "Uhm. Do you want to take this now?" He asks. I nod. "Okay." He nods back and hands me the box.

*Sam POV*

She's been in there for a while. I walk over and knock on the bathroom door. "Everything okay?" I hear shuffling and then the door opens.

"I'm waiting for the results." She answers. She looks like she's been crying. I walk in and hold the sides of her face and kiss her. She leans into my touch and holds my sides. I need her to know that it's going to be okay. I kiss her hard. I feel her relax and I pull my face away just enough.

"I know your scared, and you have every right to be. What ever it says, I'm not going anywhere. Pregnant or not, you are my best friend, and the love of my life, and I will always be here." I stare deep into her eyes so she knows I mean what I say. She softly smiles and she nods.

"I love you." She whispers.

"I love you." I whisper back. I let go of her face and look down at the test. "Is it ready?" She nods her head. She reaches for it and flips it over.

[  —  ]

"Negative." She sighs. I feel a little bit of myself brake. I love her. And I know I'm going on tour soon. But I want a family. And I want one with her. I want Eden to have a little sister or brother running around. I want our Christmas tree to be full of presents for all of our children. To be able to sit on the back pitch of a home we made, and watch our kids playing. Birthdays, and family vacations. I want that. I quickly wipe the disappointment off my face. I look over at her and she looks sad.

"What's wrong?" I lay my hand on her back.

"Nothing." She sighs.

"Come on." I start rubbing little circles.

"Do you want kids." She looks up at me.

"Of course i do." I answer.

"Do you want kids with me?" Her voice cracks and her eyes become teary.

"More than anything." It brakes my heart even more to see her upset. She wipes her eyes.

"Can we go to bed?" She asks. I nod. She throws the test into the trash can and walks out of the bathroom. I stand there for a moment. Did she want to have kids with me?