50 Shades of Drake 3 and 4

Torn: Chapter Three

    Destiny was rocked by Aubrey's heartfelt words. "You sound so sure."

    "Because I am," he said. "And until you're as sure as I am, there's no way we can move forward. If you don't deal with your feelings head-on, and confront them, then we'll always be stuck in this limbo in our relationship...some place between happy and miserable. Our love has the potential for greatness, has the potential to be the kind of love that people only read about or see in movies. Having seen that potential, I can't allow us to just...stay in this rut between hell and paradise."

    "You are such a writer," she said softly, raising a hand to his face.

    The boyish grin he flashed was incredibly disarming. "I didn't mean to make some long, drawn out speech."

    She shook her head. "It was perfect." Caressing his cheek, she leaned forward and kissed him. With her lips locked on his, she repositioned herself and got on her knees beside him on the couch. Her arms went around his neck.

    One of his arms slid around her waist, and he pulled her closer to him.

    This is what our love should feel like, she thought while kissing him. This is how it used to be, how it used to feel. A bunch of little perfect moments like this, drawn out over a long period of time. But these days, whenever we have moments like this, Brian will randomly pop into my head and... She broke off the kiss and her eyes fluttered open.

    Aubrey opened his eyes and stared at her. His eyes might as well have been question marks.

    She sat back on her haunches. "I'm...I'm sorry."

    He sighed and drew away from her. "Do you want to know why I'm pushing you to do this?" he asked her. "This. You just demonstrated why. I love you. I love you to death, but I can't tolerate you having another man on your mind. I can't tolerate beautiful moments like that, completely ruined because you have him locked away in some part of your heart, I don't care how small that part is."

    "You're right," she said, avoiding eye contact with him. She could feel tears burning beneath her eyelids. "I'm sorry. I don't even know why...I was just..."

    "I don't need excuses," he said, his hands dropping into his lap. "I need action, Destiny."

    "Okay," she said quietly.

    "Okay?" he repeated.

    "I'll do it," she said readily. "I'll agree to your proposition." She lifted her gaze and looked him in the eyes.

    He stared at her and stroked his chin. "Okay. I'll have a contract drawn up." He stood from the couch.

    She reached out and grabbed his arm. "Wait...a contract?"

    "Yes."

    "Why would we need to sign a contract?"

    "So each party knows their responsibilities, when the dating period starts and stops, and the specifics regarding the agreement," he said matter-of-factly.

    She didn't know why she hated the idea of putting the terms of the agreement on paper. "Couldn't we all just agree to the terms, like adults?"

    He narrowed his eyes. "I...guess. But with something this sensitive, I would prefer to have all of the terms outlined clearly on paper."

    "That doesn't seem...impersonal to you?" she asked him. "All of the contracts, it makes interaction feel like an obligation, instead of natural."

    "I'm allowing you to date myself and another man," he said, his brow creasing. "Nothing about that is natural."

    She sighed. "I guess you're right."

    He rubbed her upper arm. "I'm aware that on the surface, I look like none of this affects me. That is habit, something I learned from the entertainment industry and something I mastered when I became the CEO and founder of Graham Enterprises. Putting on a brave front. Don't let my composure fool you. This does affect me. Knowing that you'll be spending time with another man does bother me. I want you all to myself, and not having you to myself...let's just say that I'm going to have to adjust to that concept. Even knowing that the setup is temporary, I want to make sure each person involved is as protected as possible - myself included. That is what the contract would help to ensure. It helps to ensure that we are sticking with a specific timeframe, sticking to a certain code of conduct. We would still need to make sure you're on birth control and make sure we're all tested. Does all of that make interaction impersonal? Yes. But it also makes sure that we are all protected, and keeps us all...as safe as can be, with a setup like this."

    "I understand," she said.

    He placed his hand at the back of her head, and kissed the top of her head. "We should get ready for bed. Tomorrow, we can let Brian know that you've agreed. I'll work at drawing up the contract. Then we can move forward, and from there...hopefully we can all move on." He extended a hand to her. "Are you coming to bed with me?"

    She nodded and accepted his hand.

~~~~~~

    Hours later, facing each other with their arms around each other, they peered at each other through darkness. Aubrey gently kissed her on the lips. Hearing that she agreed to dating both him and Brian for a period of time had been bittersweet. "Something that I've challenged myself, with this whole thing, the...allowing you to date Brian thing...is to open myself up more to you," he said, his voice groggy with sleep.

    "Really?" she asked, sounding surprised.

    "I know that I've been closed off," he told her. "It hasn't been easy for me to be closed off. The foundation my entire rap career was based on was me being more open and honest than any other rapper before me. I was never a fan of hiding my feelings, my emotions, or my past. Back then, I wanted everything out on the table. Just...served myself up on a platter, to everyone who took the time to listen. You know?"

    "What changed that?" she asked, her voice laced with curiosity.

    "Robyn."

    "Oh. Right." She grew quiet.

    Just saying her name out loud made him want to pull Destiny even closer to him, made him want to hold onto her a little tighter. "That entire phase in my life changed me to my core. I saw myself changing, and it scared me. Because I saw the change happening, but I couldn't even stop it. I trusted her, and that trust was betrayed, so I didn't want to put myself out there anymore. I didn't want to be open anymore. I kind of withdrew inside of myself after that. The business industry, like I've told you before, taught me that it's a liability to be as open as I was. So...I just closed off, and that became the new normal for me."

    "It sounds like I'm not the only one who has to sort through my feelings before we can move forward," she remarked.

    He smiled in the dark. "Touche," he said before planting a kiss to her forehead.